


Light Up

by Adders



Category: Criminal Minds (US TV)
Genre: Aaron Hotchner is Bad at Feelings, Aftercare, Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Angst, Autism, Bondage, Canonical Character Death, Cuddling & Snuggling, Detox, Dom/sub, Drug Addiction, HIV testing, M/M, Multiple Orgasms, Orgasm Delay/Denial, Overstimulation, Panic Attacks, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Prostate Milking, Punishment, Riding, Rossi is such a dad, Rough Oral Sex, Rough Sex, Safeword Use, Safewords, Sex Toys, Spanking, Spencer and Jack Bonding, Vibrators, Wakes & Funerals, talk of HIV
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-04-17
Updated: 2021-01-31
Packaged: 2021-03-01 18:29:18
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 10
Words: 24,646
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23701594
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Adders/pseuds/Adders
Summary: Hotch realizes Reid needs someone to be in control while he spirals after being kidnapped by Tobias.
Relationships: Aaron Hotchner/Spencer Reid
Comments: 61
Kudos: 618





	1. Chapter 1

Aaron had always prided himself on his ability to remain professional in the face of difficult situations, but handling himself around Spencer was always a challenge. There was something so innocent about the doctor that made Aaron want to control him. Spencer always looked to him the most for guidance, always waiting patiently for orders.

Spencer’s abduction by Tobias affected everyone, but being the leader, Aaron had to make himself look calm, even as he watched their youngest agent being terrorized through the webcam. When the chair tipped over and Spencer began convulsing, Aaron couldn’t bear to watch, feeling helpless for the first time in a long time.

They all watched with bated breath as Tobias broke from his delusions for a moment and attempted to revive Spencer, performing CPR on him until he opened his eyes and struggled to breathe.

Aaron knew that Spencer wouldn’t misquote anything without purpose and caught the message about the cemetery. When they found him, the feeling of Spencer hugging him tightly, clinging on to him and saying, “I knew you’d understand” filled Aaron with such relief, but he was confused when the younger boy asked to be alone with Tobias’ body.

As days passed after Spencer was released from the hospital, Aaron noticed the difference in the doctor’s personality. He expected him to be different after enduring that sort of trauma, but it didn’t take long for him to figure out that Spencer was using after the hospital had found Dilaudid in his system.

Spencer began disobeying orders, putting himself in harm's way during cases, and distancing himself from the team. Aaron had enough and needed to put a stop to it before Spencer got himself killed.

Aaron cornered the agent in JJ’s office, blocking the door.

“You can’t avoid me forever,” he said.

“I’m n- I’m not  _ avoiding  _ you,” Spencer sputtered.

“I want you to pack your bags and get clean at my apartment,” Aaron said and Spencer’s eyes widened.

“I’m your subordinate, what would it look like if someone saw me staying at your place?” Spencer asked, looking for a way out of the situation.

“I will not allow one of my agents to be a drug addict. It’s interfering with your ability to work,” Aaron said.

“I can get clean on my own,” Spencer snapped, the hostility not surprising him.

“I can tell you’ve tried twice already,” Aaron said and Spencer immediately deflated, looking down at the floor.

“I’ll send you my address. Go home, pack everything you need, stay at my place until you’re fully sober,” Aaron said, “you’ll attend NA meetings for law enforcement afterwards. Understand?”

Spencer nodded. “I understand,” he said quietly.

“Good,” Aaron said, “I’ll see you tonight.”

Aaron called a friend who could provide him knowledge and medications on how to help someone going through detox.

Aaron knew Spencer had been using heavily, but he was surprised when the younger man began to show symptoms within only a few hours of being at the apartment. Aaron searched his bags to make sure Spencer hadn’t brought any Dilaudid with him while the genius began pacing around the apartment, twitching and looking stressed.

Aaron was reluctant to leave him alone the following morning when he checked on the doctor and found him curled up and shivering under the blankets in the guest bedroom.

“Spencer, I have to go to work. You can call me at  _ any _ time. I’ll keep in contact,” he said. Spencer nodded and pulled the blanket up higher.

Aaron set down a couple water bottles and snacks on the bedside table and couldn’t stop himself from affectionately brushing Spencer’s hair back. Spencer looked up at him curiously and Aaron covered his tracks by saying, “your fever is pretty bad, make sure to drink water.”

Just like he said, Aaron frequently texted and called Spencer to ask how he was doing. It was clear the younger was trying to hide the pain behind his voice.

“Symptoms?” he asked.

_ “Uhn… n-nausea, disorientation, muscle aches, fever, tr-tremors,” _ Spencer said quietly.

Spencer’s texts became more incoherent as the hours passed, causing Aaron to count down every second until he could go home.

“Where’s Reid?” Morgan stopped by his office at some point.

“He’s taking some personal time,” Aaron said.

“Is he okay?” Morgan asked.

“He’ll be fine,” Aaron said dismissively.

“Hotch,” Morgan said seriously, “I’m worried about him.  _ Really  _ worried about him.”

“I know,” Aaron sighed, “but we have to have enough faith in him to believe he will be alright.”

Morgan nodded and went back to his desk, leaving Aaron alone to think about whatever Spencer must be going through all alone. When he was finally able to leave the office, he gained some questioning looks as he never left on time, but he wasn’t about to slow himself.

He got home quickly and unlocked his apartment door. He entered the guest bedroom and heard the shower running, but the bathroom door was wide open. Aaron didn’t want to invade Spencer’s privacy and was about to leave when he caught a glimpse of what was happening.

“Spencer?” he called out concernedly and received no response.

He entered the bathroom to see Spencer lying in the tub with only his pants on, shaking violently with water raining down on him from the showerhead.

“What are you doing?” Aaron asked.

“Mm hot,” Spencer groaned.

Aaron put his hand under the stream to feel the temperature and pulled back when he was shocked by the ice cold water.

“You’re going to give yourself hypothermia!” he scowled, turning the water off and ignoring Spencer as he started whining petulantly.

He took off his suit jacket and tossed it to the side before grabbing a towel and lifting Spencer out of the tub, wrapping his shivering body up and practically carrying him to the bed. He grabbed a pair of sweatpants, boxer briefs, and a shirt from Spencer’s bag and instructed him to get changed.

Spencer just stared at him confusedly, almost like he couldn’t understand what Aaron was saying. Aaron sighed and began undressing Spencer, who flailed as he realized he was suddenly naked in front of his boss. Aaron dried him with the towel and dressed him, forcing himself not to pay attention to the delicate curves of Spencer’s body.

He dressed the younger man and wrapped an arm around his waist, half carrying him to the living room and placing him on the couch. “I’m going to make us dinner,” Aaron said.

“Oh, please no,” Spencer whined, curling up in a fetal position on the couch.

“You have to eat something.”

“Nausea,” Spencer shook his head, “I don’t want to.”

Aaron went to his cabinet and pulled out one of the medications his friend had given him. He had left a dose out for Spencer earlier, but it had worn off before he got home. He popped one of the capsules out of its blister and filled a glass with water.

“The nausea should calm down enough for you to eat,” Aaron said, helping Spencer sit up so he could take the pill “I’m making chicken noodle soup.”

“Hotch, I really don’t want to eat,” Spencer cringed.

“When we’re not at work, you can call me Aaron,” he said, “and you have to. It’ll help to have something in your stomach.”

Spencer looked like he wanted to argue, but didn’t have the energy to argue with the older man. He curled up on the couch again and pulled a blanket over himself.

Aaron went about making the soup, occasionally looking over to check on Spencer. The doctor was asleep by the time the soup was done and Aaron gently shook him. Spencer woke up startled, instinctively striking out. Aaron grabbed his delicate wrist before Spencer could hit him in the face.

“Easy,” Aaron said calmly, “easy.” 

“S-sorry,” Spencer said, blush intensifying beyond the fever that made his cheeks red.

“Is this common?” Aaron asked.

“Ever since… since the thing with Raphael,” Spencer said.

“Raphael?” Aaron looked at him curiously, “you mean Tobias?”

“Tobias tried to help me, Raphael and Charles were the bad ones,” Spencer said.

“They were all the same person.”

“I-I know but… I don’t blame Tobias. He was sick, I wish I could have gotten him help,” Spencer shook his head.

“It wasn’t your fault what happened,” Aaron said, “you had to shoot him.”

“He was Charles when I shot him. Tobias asked if I thought he would see his mother, and I didn’t know what to say,” Spencer said quietly.

“Spencer, you got through it,” Aaron said.

“I know, but sometimes it feels like I didn’t,” Spencer looked at him.

“Come on, let’s eat,” Aaron said, patting Spencer’s thigh.

He helped the younger man up, wrapping an arm around his waist and walking him to the living room where he sat him down at the dining table. He brought out a bowl of soup and set it in front of him, giving him some crackers too.

Spencer tentatively took a sip. “It’s good,” he said.

“It’s Haley’s recipe, she makes it for Jack whenever he’s sick,” Aaron said.

“Am I gonna get in the way of visitation for Jack coming here?” Spencer asked, knowing the couple was having their divorce finalized.

“He’ll be here later this weekend, but since it’s Monday, your symptoms will be mostly gone by the time Saturday comes around,” Aaron said.

“Haley’s not gonna find it weird that I’m here?”

“Why would she?” Aaron asked.

“I don- I uh I don’t know,” Spencer looked away, “you just… don’t invite your coworkers over very often.”

“I don’t usually have a reason,” Aaron said.

The next few days were difficult, but Spencer’s symptoms began fading on the third day and by the fourth day, he only had some minor nausea and muscle aches. The shaking in his hands had almost completely disappeared and his irritability had calmed down significantly although he still got frustrated easily.

Jack came over on Saturday and played with Spencer. Aaron watched closely, just to make sure Spencer wasn’t getting stressed out, but the two seemed to get along perfectly and it made Aaron incredibly happy.

Jack was the center of his world, but Spencer was close to his heart too. He cared about everyone in the BAU, but Spencer really was special to him. Seeing the two people he cared about the most fitting together so well brought a smile to his face as they sat on the floor and drew pictures together.

Aaron made him stay for a few more days until he was satisfied Spencer was completely through withdrawal, only experiencing some mood swings and insomnia.

Before he allowed Spencer to return home, he took the younger agent’s keys and called Gideon to help search Spencer’s apartment top to bottom, looking for any paraphernalia. Spencer had told him where he kept his stash, and the two disposed of it, but still searched for anything else, finding nothing.

Even though they profiled Spencer, if he hadn’t told them where to find the stash, they never would have located it, and that concerned Aaron greatly that they might have missed something. Spencer swore to them it was the only thing he kept in his apartment, and they didn’t see any sign of a lie.

Aaron frequently stopped by Spencer’s apartment unannounced, just to see how he was doing outside of work and invited the doctor over to his own place often. Their bond became stronger over time and they were more in sync during cases, not needing to speak out loud to know what the other was going to do.

The day after Spencer found Gideon’s letter, he showed up at Aaron’s door, eyes red and looking like he’d been crying. Aaron stepped to the side and let him in, looking closely for any sign that Spencer might be high.

“Did you use?” Aaron asked.

Spencer shook his head.

“Say it.”

“I’m still c-clean,” Spencer said, voice sounding broken, “I didn’t use.”

“Good,” Aaron said, placing a hand on Spencer’s shoulder.

“I wanted to,” Spencer whispered, eyes tearing up, “that’s… that’s why I came here. I just… didn’t want to be alone.”

Aaron squeezed his shoulder, “I’m glad you came to me.”

“You’re not mad?” Spencer frowned.

“Why would I be mad?” Aaron asked.

“Because… because I  _ want  _ to use,” Spencer looked up at him, tears on his cheek.

Aaron was flooded by an overwhelming need to comfort the younger agent and hugged him tightly. The moment Aaron wrapped his arms around him, Spencer broke down, crying into his chest.

“I expected you to have cravings as soon as I was notified of Gideon’s letter. I’m not mad at you at all, I’m proud of you for coming to me instead of the drug,” Aaron said.

“R-really?” Spencer hiccupped.

Aaron’s heart clenched at the tone, “yes, really.”

Aaron didn’t want to let go of the doctor, but he reluctantly released him when Spencer slowly pulled away, trying to get himself under control.

“Stay the night,” Aaron said.

“I didn’t bring any clothes,” Spencer shook his head.

“I’ll lend you some,” Aaron led him to the couch, “my guest bedroom is always open to you.”

“Why?” Spencer asked, “I’m your subordinate. Why are you helping me so much?”

“I care about you, Spencer,” Aaron said, “you’re a good agent. I think it would be a disservice to the world if I didn’t do my part to make sure you are the best you can possibly be.”

“Thank you, Hotch,” Spencer said quietly.

“ _ Aaron _ ,” he corrected him. 

“Thank you… Aaron,” Spencer tentatively tested the new name as if waiting to get in trouble for saying it.

“Are you hungry?” Aaron asked.

“No, I’m good,” Spencer said.

“Did you eat?” Aaron questioned.

“I’m just not hungry,” Spencer shook his head.

“I’ll make us something,” Aaron said, getting up.

“No, it’s okay! You really don’t need t-,” he was cut off by the look Aaron gave him. “Okay,” he said quietly, “food is okay.”

Aaron nodded approvingly and went about fixing something for them to eat. He rarely ever had time to do it for Haley and Jack, but he secretly enjoyed cooking for other people. He had taken courses with his brother when they were younger, he assumed that’s where Sean got his passion for being a cook.

Aaron made penne alla vodka for the two of them. They sat in a comfortable silence as they ate together, but Aaron could see Spencer’s mind was racing.

“What are you thinking about?” Aaron asked once they were finished.

“Where do you think Gideon is?”

“I don’t know. I don’t think he wants us to know,” Aaron said.

“You’ll have to find someone to replace him,” Spencer said emptily.

“I know the transition is gonna be hard on everyone, you especially, but I will find someone who is an asset to the team,” Aaron said, “he was your mentor, this is not gonna be easy for you."

“I’m worried,” Spencer said.

“About?”

“I don’t feel in control,” Spencer said, “I wish someone could just take over everything and make decisions for me.”

Aaron felt heat in his stomach the moment Spencer said that and the doctor obviously caught on to the change of emotions on his face.

“What?” he asked nervously.

“Do you want me to?” Aaron asked, “do you want me to take over for you?"

Spencer ran his tongue over his lips. While he was not the best at social cues and flirting, he picked up on the insinuating tone in Aaron’s voice.

“You’d want to be my Dominant?” Spencer twitched.

“If you ask me to be,” Aaron said.

“That’s not very professional Agent Hotchner,” Spencer joked, not knowing what to say in response.

“Spencer, do you want me to be your Dominant?” Aaron asked seriously.

Spencer seemed to be scanning his face, looking for any indication that it might be a prank, that Morgan or Garcia would be coming through the door laughing any moment.

"Yes."


	2. Chapter 2

**AN:** I think we can all agree, there's not enough Hotch/Reid smut, so here's some for you!

* * *

Their relationship started out slowly, and in secret of course. Spencer seemed to thrive under Aaron’s guidance, far more focused at work and smiling more than anyone had ever seen.

They all assumed Spencer had met some girl, they didn’t know he was staying at Aaron’s house occasionally. Aaron gave him a strict schedule that left no room for Spencer to second guess himself and the structure improved his mental health immensely.

Spencer clicked well with Rossi and built a strong friendship with both him and Prentiss, who Spencer had initially not gotten along with. He and JJ, Morgan, and Garcia were closer than ever, despite them constantly berating him about the mystery person in Spencer’s life that was making him so happy.

Aaron didn’t initiate sexual contact at first. He waited until Spencer asked for it himself, not wanting to press him into doing anything he didn’t feel comfortable doing.

“Why haven’t we done anything?” Spencer questioned, looking at the ground and fiddling his fingers together.

“In what way?” Aaron asked, knowing damn well what Spencer was talking about, but wanting to hear it from the younger man’s mouth.

“Sexual,” Spencer blushed.

“Is that something you’d like?” Aaron cocked a brow.

“I well, y-yes? I mean… i-i-if you’d like it t-too,” Spencer stuttered, cheeks bright red as he looked anywhere but at Aaron.

“If you want something, you just have to ask,” Aaron approached him, wrapping his arms around his waist and pulling him close, kissing him passionately. Spencer moaned softly, melting against him and resting his hands on Aaron’s chest.

Aaron grabbed the hem of Spencer’s shirt, pulling it up and over his head. Spencer shied away, trying to cover his pale chest. Aaron grabbed his wrists and moved them away, eyes scanning him.

“You’re beautiful, Spencer,” Aaron said, enjoying the blush that flooded his cheeks.

“Can I see you too?” Spencer asked quietly.

Aaron pulled off his own shirt, his tan skin in stark contrast to Spencer’s. He led the younger agent to the master bedroom, guiding him to stand in front of the bed. He slowly undid Spencer’s belt, letting his pants fall to the ground and pool around his ankles.

He shoved Spencer onto the bed and stripped him of his boxer briefs, leaving him completely bare and exposed. He pulled off his own pants and boxers, climbing onto the bed and hovering over Spencer.

The doctor spread his legs for Aaron to fit between, grinding against each other. “How far do you want to go?” Aaron asked.

“All the way,” Spencer said.

“Safeword?”

“Einstein.”

“Good,” Aaron said, “remember that.”

“I remember everything,” Spencer smiled.

Aaron reached over to the bedside table, pulling the drawer open and retrieving the tube of lube. He trailed kisses along Spencer’s jawline and down his chest, leaving hickeys where he knew no one but Spencer would see them.

He sat up and put a pillow under Spencer’s hips and poured some lube on his fingers, circling Spencer’s hole and teasing him until the younger looked at him with pleading eyes. He slowly pressed one in, pumping it and letting Spencer get used to the feeling before adding a second one.

The doctor let out a moan as a third one joined and angled up, rubbing the bundle of nerves.

“Please,” Spencer gasped.

“Relax, let me take care of you,” Aaron ran a hand along Spencer’s soft abs, wondering how on earth the younger acquired them.

Once Aaron was satisfied Spencer was thoroughly prepped, he slicked his cock with lube and positioned himself at Spencer’s entrance. He slowly began pressing in, watching Spencer’s mouth form a little ‘o’ shape.

He paused when he saw Spencer wince, wrapping a hand around the younger agent’s dick and pumping to distract him from the discomfort of being stretched.

“Keep going,” Spencer said. Aaron raised a brow at him and Spencer quickly added, “please?”

“Good boy,” Aaron said instinctively and felt Spencer’s dick twitch in his hand. “I always knew you had a thing for praise,” Aaron smirked, enjoying the moan Spencer let out as Aaron started moving again, pushing in until he fully bottomed out.

He gave Spencer some time to adjust considering he was larger than average. He lent down and kissed him softly.

“Please, move,” Spencer said quietly against his lips.

Aaron pulled out slightly before thrusting back in slowly, building to a faster, stronger pace. He didn’t expect Spencer to make much noise, but he was surprised at the sweet, loud moans the doctor was letting out.

“Fuck, Spencer,” Aaron groaned, kissing along his neck, “you feel so good.”

“Harder, please,” Spencer gasped, crying out when Aaron did exactly as he asked. He raked his nails down Aaron’s back, surely leaving marks as he arched his own, feeling himself getting close.

He whined in distress when Aaron wrapped a hand around the base of his cock and squeezed, stopping his impending orgasm.

“Not yet,” Aaron growled.

He sat up taller and grabbed Spencer by the hips with a hard grip as he pounded the younger agent underneath him.

“Please! Please, please, can I cum?!” Spencer pleaded.

“You sound so good when you beg like that,” Aaron said. He shifted around slightly and saw Spencer’s eyes nearly rolled back at the new angle.

“PLEASE!” Spencer sobbed.

“Cum,” Aaron ordered and watched as Spencer came over himself untouched, mouth open in a silent scream and body going taut.

Aaron fucked him through it, extending his orgasm and pushing him into the realm of oversensitivity that had tears trailing down Spencer’s cheeks. Aaron’s pace began to falter and he gripped Spencer’s hips hard enough he was sure it would leave bruises as he slammed into him.

After a few more hard thrusts, he buried himself as deep as possible before cumming inside of him. Spencer gasped under him, feeling the heat inside of him.

The silence surrounding them was only filled by the sound of them trying to catch their breath.

Aaron leaned down and kissed him, panting against each other’s mouths. “You were so good for me,” he said.

“I think I  _ may  _ have scratched you,” Spencer bit his kiss swollen bottom lip.

Aaron chuckled and kissed his forehead. “That’s okay,” he said, “let’s get cleaned up.”

“Can we just stay here for a little while?” Spencer asked shyly, almost like he was afraid of Aaron’s response.

“Of course,” Aaron said. He slowly pulled out, kissing Spencer to distract him and rolling into his back, pulling the doctor to rest against his chest.

Spencer seemed entertained by his chest hair, playing with it by running his fingertips through it.

“Having fun there?” Aaron asked amusedly.

Spencer giggled adorably and nodded, snuggling closer against him. Aaron stroked along his arm, enjoying the feeling of holding the younger agent.

“I didn’t expect you to be the loud type,” Aaron said.

Spencer covered his blushing face with his hand, “I’m not usually. You just… made me feel really good.”

“I’m glad you enjoyed it,” Aaron chuckled.

“We uh we didn’t use a condom,” Spencer frowned.

“I get all of the paperwork from my agents’ physicals,” Aaron said, “neither of us have any STDs or anything, although you have a slight iron deficiency.”

“I’m dealing with that,” Spencer laughed.

“Good,” Aaron kissed the top of his head.

They laid there for some time until the stickiness of their drying sweat became too uncomfortable. Aaron’s bathroom had both a tub and a shower, and they decided just to take a quick shower, wanting to get back to bed as soon as possible as sleepiness began to creep up on them.

Aaron ran his fingers over the handprint shaped bruises on Spencer’s hips and all the love bites that littered the pale skin of his chest and tummy. 

Spencer had his own drawer in one of Aaron’s dressers filled with clothes and toiletries for when he stayed the night, but he still stole one of Aaron’s shirts to wear to bed, bringing a smile to the older man’s face when he saw it hanging loosely off his slight frame.

Aaron had changed the sheets while Spencer was getting changed and he picked up the doctor playfully, tossing him onto the bed and enjoying the surprised squeak Spencer let out. They shuffled around in bed until they ended up in a comfortable position and sleep quickly overtook them.

Aaron’s phone rang at just past 5 am, waking them both up. He was spooning Spencer from behind and reached over him to grab his cell.

“Hotchner,” he answered, listening closely, “I’ll be in right away.” He hung up the phone and Spencer groaned loudly.

“I don’t wanna get uuuuup,” he whined.

“Sorry,” Aaron kissed his neck. “I have to call the others.” Spencer turned and looked at him with a pout, but Aaron held fast, lightly smacking the doctor’s ass, “come on,” he said, “time to get up.”

Spencer huffed, but threw the covers off of himself and sat up slowly, his hair a complete mess. Aaron began calling the rest of the team one by one, enduring their complaining about getting up so early while Spencer got dressed in his work clothes.

Once Aaron finished calling everyone and got dressed too, they had a quick breakfast together before they left to head to Quantico. Normally, Aaron would have dropped Spencer off at his apartment and let the doctor take the metro as he always did, but he decided to drive them both instead.

“I need you to be prepared for this one,” Aaron said.

“Why?” Spencer asked.

“The call implied there might be a child fatality,” Aaron said solemnly.

Spencer sighed. He hated cases involving children and was surprised Aaron hadn’t said anything earlier, but assumed the man didn’t want to put him in a bad mood first thing in the morning.

They were the first to arrive followed by Morgan. “Pretty boy, I didn’t expect you to be the first one here,” Morgan said. 

“Hotch gave me a ride,” Spencer said.

The others began to arrive soon after and JJ got straight into debriefing the new case once they were all there. There had been three children killed in the past three weeks in a small town in Kansas and local law enforcement had just found the third.

Soon, they were headed to Kansas in the jet, discussing victimology.

“When we land, Reid and Morgan go to the newest crime scene, Rossi and I will meet up with local law enforcement, and JJ and Prentiss interview the families and any potential witnesses,” Aaron said.

Everyone split up into their groups when they arrived and Spencer found himself in an awkward conversation with Morgan as they drove to the most recent scene.

“So, you got laid last night,” Morgan said.

“Wh-uh what?” Spencer fidgeted.

“I thought you were with a girl, but from the way you’re sitting, I’d say it was a guy,” Morgan wiggled his eyebrows at him.

Spencer went beet red and looked out the window, wishing a black hole would absorb him.

“Hey, you don’t have to be ashamed or anything,” Morgan assured him, “there’s nothing wrong with it and I won’t tell anyone else. But, can you at least tell me his name?”

“I’d rather it stay private,” Spencer said shyly.

“Alright, Kid. Keep your secrets,” Morgan chuckled. 

“Sorry,” Spencer mumbled.

“Nah, don’t be sorry, Reid,” Morgan said, “I’ll respect your privacy. But if this guy hurts you, come to me and I’ll handle it”

“He won’t,” Spencer smiled to himself.


	3. Chapter 3

Based off season 3 episode 16: Elephant Memory

* * *

Aaron sensed something off with Spencer the moment they started getting into the details of the case in Texas. His demeanor completely changed and he acted bitterly towards the teachers and adults he blamed for not intervening earlier to prevent the unsub’s behaviour.

He knew he was going to have to have a serious talk with Spencer after the doctor threw the file on the floor and stomped out of the room. He apologized to the principal, and again later to the sheriffs. The brief argument in the office before he sent Spencer to go to Morgan angered him, but he understood Spencer was letting his own feelings get involved.

What he couldn’t abide by was Spencer putting himself in danger, blocking the shot to the unsub. Although he did talk Owen down, Aaron was furious that Spencer had put himself in that situation.

He made a show of reprimanding Spencer on the plane, but he let the younger man know that they weren’t finished. He invited Spencer over to his apartment later that night and told him exactly what was to happen.

“Spencer, I’m going to punish you,” Aaron said, “you have your safeword to use if necessary and I’ll stop. I won’t be disappointed if you can’t handle it."   


“But, you’re disappointed with me right now,” Spencer said.

“I am,” Aaron said, “you acted without regard for your safety or the safety of those around you.”

“I knew I could get through to him,” Spencer pouted.

“What if you didn’t get through to him? What if he had shot you the moment you approached him?” Aaron scowled, “you put your life in jeopardy and you deliberately didn’t tell us where Owen was going. You lied to me.”

“I didn’t  _ lie,  _ I just didn’t tell the truth,” Spencer looked away guiltily.

“Strip,” Aaron said.

Spencer began to pull off his clothes and folded them neatly, setting them down on the couch and following Aaron to the bedroom. He watched as Aaron undid his belt, pulling it from the loops and his heartbeat increased.

“Bend over my lap,” Aaron said, sitting down on the bed. 

Spencer swallowed harshly and slowly draped himself over Aaron’s thighs. “I’m going to hit you ten times,” Aaron said, “what’s your safeword?”

“Einstein,” Spencer said quietly.

“Say it if you need to. I want you to count. If you lose track, we start over,” Aaron said, “understand?”

“I understand, Sir,” Spencer whispered, throat feeling dry as a hand ghosted over his ass before the belt came down hard. He jerked, crying out at the pain and grabbing the blanket of the bed. “O-one,” he said after a moment.

“Good,” Aaron said, bringing the belt down again.

“Two,” Spencer gasped.

Aaron aimed for the seat area, where Spencer’s butt met his thighs and was the most painful area.

“Three!” Spencer yelled, writhing around until Aaron used his other arm to hold him still.

By the time they reached ten, Spencer was crying softly but was achingly hard as Aaron ran a hand over the reddened skin of his ass, tracing the lines of bruises already beginning to appear.

He heard the sound of the lube bottle snapping before a slick finger pressed into him followed by a second one close behind. Spencer moaned as Aaron hooked his fingers and targeted the bundle of nerves. Spencer shivered, rutting against the older man’s thigh.

Aaron pulled his fingers out, ignoring Spencer’s whine. He lifted the doctor and put him on the bed while he stood up and undressed himself.

“You’re going to ride me,” Aaron said, getting on the bed and lying down on his back.

Spencer clamoured onto his lap, straddling him as he poured lube on his cock. Aaron positioned it by his entrance and said, “go slow. I only used two fingers on you.”

Spencer nodded and slowly began to sink onto him. He winced slightly at the burn of being stretched. He wanted to start moving right away despite the uncomfortableness, but Aaron grabbed him by the hips and kept him still.

“Give yourself a minute,” he said.

Spencer took a deep breath and tried to make himself relax as Aaron stroked his cock lightly. Once the discomfort passed, Spencer lifted himself slightly before sliding back down with a moan.

He placed his hands on Aaron’s chest and used it as leverage as he began to bounce. His thighs shook with the strain and Aaron helped direct him. Every time he started getting close, Aaron wrapped a hand around the base of his cock, stopping him from coming. 

“Please!” Spencer whined, ass smarting every time it came into contact with Aaron’s thighs.

“Keep going,” Aaron ordered, continuing to edge him again and again.

He could barely lift himself anymore, his thighs aching, so Aaron began bucking up into him, holding him by the hips. Spencer was cumming before he could stop himself and collapsed against him. Aaron wrapped his arms around Spencer, holding him in place while he fucked him roughly.

Spencer nearly sobbed at the overstimulation, head going fuzzy as pleasure sparked through his body. Aaron grunted as he slammed into him and stilled, cumming with a low moan. 

Aaron stroked along his back, cradling Spencer as he trembled and they both caught their breath.

“Mm sorry,” Spencer mumbled.

“I know,” Aaron kissed the top of his head.

Spencer slowly moved off of him, thighs aching and ass sore. He laid on his stomach next to Aaron, not wanting to be on his back. He had his eyes closed and jumped slightly when he felt something cold on the burning skin of his cheeks.

Aaron was rubbing some kind of cream or gel on him and Spencer assumed it was pain relieving as he began to feel better within a couple minutes, or it might have just been the comfort of Aaron’s hands on him.

“You did very well,” Aaron nipped his ear and Spencer turned his head to get a kiss.

“Are you still mad at me?” Spencer asked quietly.

“No,” Aaron said, “you took your punishment and apologized.”

“Can you hold me?” Spencer whispered.

Aaron shuffled closer and held out his arm, waiting for Spencer to turn on his side before he pulled him against his chest. He trailed his fingers along Spencer’s shoulder and played with his long hair while the doctor fell asleep quickly, exhausted from riding him.

Aaron stayed awake a little longer, mind racing with thoughts of what might have happened if Spencer hadn’t been able to talk Owen out of his plans. Those moments where Spencer was blocking the shot, facing a killer with an automatic weapon had Aaron in terror that the younger was going to get himself killed.

Spencer snuggled a little closer to him in his sleep, throwing a leg over Aaron and letting out a soft, pleased sound when Aaron held him tighter.

* * *

“I hope you know what you’re doing,” Rossi came into Aaron’s office.

“In what way?” Aaron asked.

“This thing with Reid,” Rossi raised a brow.

Aaron sighed, “how’d you know?”

“You started being in a better mood right at the same time it was obvious Reid was sleeping with a man,” Rossi said, “it doesn’t take a genius to figure out it was you.”

“Do the others know?” Aaron asked.

“I won’t say anything. Your secret is safe with me, but they  _ will  _ find out eventually. They’re the best profilers in the world,” Rossi shook his head, “what were you thinking? Reid was in a fragile state.”

“I was hoping to give him some stability,” Aaron pinched between his eyes.

“Stability? Aaron, you’re his  _ boss, _ ” Rossi sighed.

“I can’t just end it,” Aaron said.

“I know,” Rossi said, “both of you have had mental health improvement since you started this relationship. It would do more damage to stop it than to keep going. Maybe you should call him in so we can talk about how to dodge Strauss.”

Aaron nodded and Rossi went to the door. “Reid,” he called out, waving the doctor over.

Spencer came in, absentmindedly holding onto the strap of his bag as he always did when interacting with other people.

“How do you two plan on hiding this from Strauss?” Rossi asked and Aaron thought Spencer was going to have a heart attack, face going pale. He immediately looked to Aaron, obviously panicking.

“Relax,” Aaron said, “Dave isn’t going to tell anyone.”

“Di- uh, did you…?” Spencer twitched nervously.

“No, I didn’t tell him, he figured it out on his own,” Aaron said.

“But, we barely interact here,” Spencer frowned.

“The only reason I know is because your moods have been different lately,” Rossi said, “you’ve both acted professionally around each other here and in the field. I’m just worried, the closer you get, the more difficult it will be to hide emotions and think rationally.”

“I’m good at separating work and emotions,” Spencer said.

“Well, your actions in Texas speak differently,” Rossi tilted his head at him and Spencer looked away guiltily.

“I think you should come up with a plan of what to do if this ever comes out,” Rossi said, “I can take over some of the evaluations so Aaron won’t look partial if they ever investigate to make sure he isn’t showing favouritism.”

“Thank you, Dave,” Aaron said.

“I want this to work,” Rossi said, “I feel like you are good for each other, but you  _ have  _ to be smart about this, okay?”

“Okay,” they both nodded.

“Alright, you crazy kids. Just stay safe,” Rossi winked at them before leaving the two of them together in the office.

“Take a minute to compose yourself before you go back to your desk. You look mortified,” Aaron had to stifle his chuckle.

“I  _ am  _ mortified,” Spencer facepalmed, “if he knows, the others are gonna to find out soon too.”

“It’s not like any of them are going to go to Strauss,” Aaron said.

“I know, but I don’t want it to seem like I’m… like I’m trying to get ahead of everyone else by being with you,” Spencer bit his lip.

“Spencer, you’re not sleeping with the boss to get a promotion,” Aaron scowled.

“But that doesn’t change the fact that I  _ am  _ sleeping with the boss,” Spencer started pacing.

“Let’s talk about this later,” Aaron said, “take a couple deep breaths.”

Spencer did as he said and breathed deeply, trying to compose himself. “I need coffee,” he mumbled to himself.

“Take it easy on the caffeine,” Aaron said softly, not wanting Spencer to replace one addictive substance with another. 

Spencer nodded and composed himself as best he could before he left and immediately went to the break room. Morgan was walking to Rossi’s office at the exact same time and looked at Spencer weird as he went past.

“Is he okay?” Morgan popped his head in and asked Aaron.

“He just needs coffee,” Aaron said.


	4. Chapter 4

With Aaron’s birthday approaching, Spencer was struggling to figure out what to get for him as a present. He thought about it over and over again, stressing about not finding anything he felt was enough to show his appreciation for everything Aaron had done for him.

The day before Aaron’s birthday when Spencer still didn’t have anything for him as they were flying back from a case, Aaron came to sit beside him.

“I don’t want you to get me anything,” he said quietly enough that no one else could hear.

“I’d feel bad if I don’t give something,” Spencer answered.

“I just want to have a nice dinner at home with you,” Aaron whispered.

“That’s it?” Spencer asked confusedly, taking a sip of his coffee.

“What about free reign to do whatever I wanted to you?” Aaron raised a brow and Spencer started choking on his drink in surprise, drawing the attention of the others.

“You okay, kid?” Morgan asked.

“I-I’m fine,” Spencer croaked.

“Don’t drink so fast,” JJ laughed.

Spencer nodded, blushing brightly in the way Aaron thought was adorable. When they landed, Aaron stayed behind to fill out paperwork while Spencer reluctantly went home. The next day was Saturday and, armed with a recipe from Rossi, Spencer showed up to Aaron’s apartment, hellbent on making the best dinner for him while he spent some time with Jack in the park.

Spencer spent hours trying to make the perfect dish for Aaron even though he was by far not the best cook of the bunch. He managed to get through it without burning anything and when he tasted it, he nearly moaned, making a mental note to thank Rossi.

Aaron returned just as Spencer was finished cooking, having dropped off Jack at home. “It smells amazing,” he said, wrapping his arms around Spencer’s waist from behind.

Spencer tilted his head to the side, letting Aaron kiss along his pale neck. “Get me some plates, please,” Spencer said.

Aaron let go of him and opened the cabinet, grabbing two plates and wine glasses.

“Rossi said red wine pairs well with it,” Spencer said, handing him a bottle.

Aaron uncorked it while Spencer spooned food onto the plates, bringing them over to the dining table. Aaron poured the wine, handing him a glass and sitting on the side opposite of him. 

As soon as he took a bite, he looked up at Spencer and said, “I think I’m just going to have to keep you.”

“Don’t count on me cooking all the time,” Spencer laughed, “I’m relieved I didn’t set the fire alarms off.”

“You did a great job, Spencer,” he said.

“Thank you,” Spencer smiled shyly.

They ate together with the sound of Aaron’s favourite music playing in the background. Spencer glanced up every now and then to see Aaron looking at him with a mischievous glint in his eyes. 

“What?” Spencer asked after a while.

“Just thinking about everything I’m going to do to you later,” Aaron said, matter of factly.

Spencer bit his lip, face flushing red again and shifting around in his seat, both excited and nervous. They finished their food and watched a movie, too full to mess around immediately after eating. Towards the end of the movie, the hand on Spencer’s leg moved to his inner thigh, creeping up higher.

Spencer swallowed heavily, spreading his legs slightly as Aaron began to palm him through his trousers. “Go to the bedroom and strip,” Aaron said.

Spencer jumped off the couch, practically running to the bedroom and hearing Aaron chuckle at his enthusiasm. He took off his clothes and folded them, adjusting them until they were completely lined perfectly and placed them on the chair in the corner before sitting on the bed.

Aaron came in holding a large shopping bag, “I’ve been waiting for the perfect time to use this stuff on you.”

Spencer looked at him quizzically, wondering what was in the bag.

“I want you to keep your eyes closed,” Aaron said and noticed Spencer looking unsure. “Do you trust me?”

“With my life,” Spencer said without hesitation.

“Then close your eyes,” Aaron said softly.

Spencer closed his eyes and followed every direction, allowing Aaron to move him however he wanted. Soon, Spencer had his arms and legs spread open towards the corners of the bed and had restraints around them, keeping him from moving.

The bed dipped next to him before hands roamed all over his body, caressing him like a fine piece of art. Spencer shivered as fingers trailed over his nipples, pinching lightly. They travelled down his chest and between his legs, circling his hole.

“Safe word?”

“Einstein.”

The pressure on the bed disappeared for a moment before it came back and Spencer felt the fingers return, cold and slick with lube. One of them pushed in slowly, pumping in and out before a second one was added.

Spencer moaned as they began stroking his prostate. He so desperately wanted to see Aaron, but he kept his eyes closed as the fingers pulled out and something bigger pressed in. It wasn’t as big as Aaron and it was shaped weirdly as it was fully pushed into him.

“Are you ready, Spencer?” Aaron asked softly.

“Yes,” Spencer said, not quite sure what he meant.

Spencer jerked as the thing inside him began to vibrate. “Uhn!” he arched his back, pleasure shooting through him. The settings of it began to increase, the vibrations intensifying.

“Spencer, I want to use your mouth,” Aaron said, “snap your fingers if it becomes too much. Okay?”

“O-ah! Okay!” Spencer said.

Aaron got higher on the bed and straddled Spencer’s head. Spencer still had his eyes closed, but he felt something tap against his chin and he opened his mouth.

He wrapped his lips around the head of Aaron’s cock, licking the slit and tasting the saltiness of precum. He heard Aaron sigh softly and the feeling and lifted his head, wanting more in his mouth.

Aaron threaded his fingers into his hair and pulled him away. “You take what I give,” he said sternly.

Spencer nodded and opened his mouth again. Aaron slowly slid partway into his mouth and began thrusting shallowly. “I’m going to go farther, okay?”

Spencer nodded slightly, trying to suppress his gag reflex as Aaron entered his throat. It wasn’t the first time he’d performed oral, he’d had boyfriends before, but none of them had been as big as Aaron.

When Aaron began to speed up, using his throat roughly, Spencer found himself more turned on by the act than expected. He made another mental note to ask about that later as he was pretty sure he just discovered a new kink he had.

He choked in surprise when the vibrator turned up higher, whining around the cock in his mouth. The tightening of his throat spurred Aaron on, thrusting in entirely and groaning as Spencer gagged.

Even though his eyes were still closed, he could feel them watering, tears building in the corners before trailing down his cheeks. 

Spencer became suddenly overwhelmed by all the sensations and yanked on the restraints as he came. The vibrator turned down slowly until it was a dull buzz and Aaron withdrew from his mouth, despite his noise of protest.

Aaron got off of him and the vibrator was turned off before it was slowly pulled out of him. His ankles were released and he felt Aaron move between his legs, pushing his knees towards his chest.

“Open your eyes,” Aaron said.

Spencer slowly opened his eyes, looking at Aaron in the low light. He was awestruck by how handsome he looked hovering over him, hair ruffled and tan skin glowing.

“Do you think you can handle more?” Aaron asked.

“Yes,” Spencer said breathlessly.

Aaron started pushing in his spit slicked cock, watching Spencer closely for any signs of discomfort. Instead of being uncomfortable, he found Spencer seemed to be enjoying the feel of being stretched.

With his arms still restrained, he couldn’t touch Aaron as he began thrusting languidly, building to a rougher pace.

“AH!” Spencer shouted at a hard thrust, throwing his head back in pleasure.

“Fuck,” Aaron hissed, leaning down to kiss him, muffling his moans.

Spencer could feel himself getting close again without even being touched. He could tell Aaron was getting close too as his pace began to falter slightly. Aaron gripped his hips tightly, strengthening his thrusts until he was pounding into Spencer. The doctor cried out under him, unable to do anything but take it.

“Please! Can I cum, please?”

“Cum,” Aaron growled.

Spencer tensed up, straining hard against the restraints as he came untouched. He whimpered as Aaron thrusted harshly a couple times before burying himself and cumming deep inside of him.

Spencer whined when he pulled out, Aaron’s dick brushing against his sensitive prostate. Aaron kissed his forehead, brushing his hair back affectionately. He grabbed a tissue from the bedside and wiped Spencer’s stomach clean before getting off the bed and starting to take off the restraints.

He massaged the reddened skin where Spencer had pulled too hard, relieving some of the ache. Once Spencer was released, Aaron got him a glass of water and instructed him to drink slowly.

“How’s your throat?” Aaron asked.

“A little sore but… um,” Spencer blushed.

“What?” Aaron questioned.

“I kinda like it,” Spencer said quietly, “I want to do that again.”

Aaron looked a little surprised but smiled, happy Spencer felt comfortable enough to share that with him when he knew how shy he was when it came to talking about what he wanted sexually.

Aaron leaned forward and kissed him, savouring the way Spencer immediately submitted to him. Spencer really was the ideal submissive for him, he couldn’t ask for anyone better.

“You’re amazing, you know that?” Aaron said.

Spencer looked at him in disbelief, cheeks going bright red again.

“I’m serious,” Aaron said, “you’re perfect for me.”

Spencer bit his lip and looked away shyly, not used to compliments.

“Let’s take a shower,” Aaron said, reaching out to stroke Spencer’s cheek.

Spencer nodded and followed him to the bathroom. Aaron turned on the water, holding his hand under it as it warmed up. He set it slightly more than he preferred, but he knew Spencer liked it hotter and the younger always got cold after sex because of the adrenaline rush passing.

Spencer had his eyes closed as Aaron washed his long hair, but he opened them wide when he felt the older man’s hard cock against him. He couldn’t believe Aaron was hard again, and was even more baffled when he himself started getting hard too.

Aaron pressed him up against the tiled wall, wrapping a hand around both of them, stroking them together. Spencer moaned, tilting his head to the side as Aaron kissed his neck and along his jawline.

Spencer didn’t know what to do with his hands, overwhelmed by the sensation of Aaron rutting against him when he was so sensitive.

“S-Sir,” he gasped.

“Cum, Spencer,” Aaron ordered, watching as the doctor shuddered through another orgasm. 

Spencer whined in discomfort as Aaron kept stroking them, forcing the younger to endure the overstimulation until he tipped over the edge, cumming too.

Spencer was shaking, struggling to keep himself standing. Aaron wrapped his arms around his waist, keeping him steady and kissing him.

“You’re always so good for me,” Aaron kissed him, “so beautiful and perfect.”

Spencer rested his head against Aaron’s chest, happy to be in his arms as the water washed over them.

When they got out of the shower, Aaron dried him off first. They brushed their teeth and Spencer pulled on some boxer briefs and one of Aaron’s shirts. He was sure at this point he’d worn half of Aaron’s casual wardrobe, but the elder didn’t seem to mind, pulling on boxers himself.

They got under the blankets and Aaron pulled him close, resting his cheek on the top of Spencer’s head. He stroked the doctor’s hair while Spencer played with his chest hair.

“Today was a great birthday,” Aaron said.

“I’m glad,” Spencer said, “you deserve to have something good.”

“Honestly, you’re the best thing that could have happened to me,” Aaron said, “I wanted you for so long, but I never imagined I could actually have you.”

“Same,” Spencer chuckled, “I never would have thought you felt this way for me.” He sat up onto his elbow to look at Aaron, smiling.

Aaron kissed him softly, tucking his semi wet hair behind his ear.

“I wonder what the others would say if they saw how gentle you are with me,” Spencer laughed.

“I wasn’t exactly gentle with you earlier,” Aaron raised a brow.

“I mean not during sex,” Spencer rolled his eyes jokingly.

“Spencer, if I’m being too rough with you or you don’t like what I’m doing, you’ll tell me, yes?” Aaron asked.

“Yes,” Spencer said, “but I trust you enough that I know you would never really hurt me.”

Aaron smiled, eyes flickering over Spencer’s face, admiring his delicate features. “I’m glad you took a chance with me,” Aaron said.

“Me too,” Spencer gave him a peck before lying back down, shuffling himself as close as possible.

Three very special words went through Aaron’s head, surprising him. He knew it was too soon to say them out loud, but he allowed himself to think it over and over.

‘I love you.’


	5. Chapter 5

**AN: TW- safeword use**

* * *

Spencer was doing exponentially better mental health-wise as his and Aaron’s relationship grew. They weren’t just friends with benefits, Aaron felt comfortable calling Spencer his boyfriend or his significant other. Aaron had taken on his role as Spencer’s dominant, but also treated him as an equal in all other aspects.

The others were aware that both of them were in relationships, but no one except Rossi knew it was with each other. It was only a matter of time before one of them figured it out, and Garcia was the one Aaron absolutely did not expect to be the first.

“Sir, I-I… I haven’t said anything about you and Reid, but I’m really bad at keeping secrets from Derek,” she said, “what do I do if he asks me about who Reid is with?”

“Just tell him it’s not anyone else’s business but Reid’s,” Aaron said.

“He’s had some worries, and I did too until I realized it was you,” Garcia said.

“Worries?” Aaron frowned.

“Well, Derek noticed a little while ago that Reid had a bruise on his wrist,” she shuffled slightly, “he thought maybe an UnSub might have done it, but then he saw more bruises on him again today. He said he was gonna talk to Reid later about it.”

“Everything we do is consensual,” Aaron said.

“Oh, God, yeah, I know,” she said quickly, “I know you would never ever hurt Reid, but Derek is in the mindset that Reid is in an abusive relationship. I know he’s safe with you, but I don’t know how Derek is going to react when he finds out, because you know he  _ will  _ find out eventually.”

Aaron nodded, “I’ll talk to him. Thank you, Garcia.”

She smiled at him and turned to leave, but before she exited she said, “I think you are a good pair. I’m happy he’s with you.”

Aaron gave her one of his rare smiles, glad to know she approved. He was just about to text Morgan when he got a text from him first.

**Morgan:** _I need to talk to you about Reid._

Aaron sighed, and told him to come to his office.

“Hotch, I think we need to do an intervention for Reid,” he said.

Aaron sat back in his chair, looking at Morgan expectantly.

“I keep seeing bruises on him,” Morgan said, “he’s in a relationship with someone, but he won’t say anything about the guy when I ask. I questioned him about the bruises, he pretty much told me to piss off and that he’s happy being with that person.”

“It’s me,” Aaron said.

There was a moment of confusion followed by pure rage, and Aaron was nearly expecting Morgan to lunge at him over the desk.

“You gotta be kidding me, man!” Morgan yelled, “why the hell would you hurt Reid like that?!”

“I haven’t hurt him at all,” Aaron said calmly.

“No, you can’t tell me that. I saw the bruises!” Morgan scowled.

“Morgan, I take all precautions to make sure everything is safe and consensual,” Aaron said, “Reid has a safeword and I respect his boundaries. If he doesn’t like what is happening, he can stop it at any time.”

“You are his boss! You’re taking advantage of the fact that you are an authority figure!” Morgan started pacing.

“How long have you known me?” Aaron asked.

“It doesn’t matter,” Morgan said.

“It does.”

“I’ve known you for a long time,” Morgan said.

“In all that time, I’ve always had my agents’ best interest in mind,” Aaron said, “Reid needed to have someone in charge. He was spiraling.”

“Exactly! He was fragile! You can’t tell me you had no ulterior motivation, he was too out of it to properly think things through. He was struggling with addiction for Godsakes!” Morgan shouted.

“He was clean before we started anything. He was fully aware of his decision and he’s free to stop the relationship at any time if that’s what he chooses,” Aaron said.

“He’s not going to, because he’s become too dependent on you,” Morgan practically growled, “did you not think about what it’s going to do to him if something happens to you? With our job, we’re in danger all the time!”

“Morgan, let me handle that,” Aaron said, “I need you to trust me that I have Reid’s best interests at heart.”

“I can’t,” Morgan said, “I need to hear it from him that he wasn’t manipulated into this.”

Aaron got up and walked past Morgan, opening the door to his office. “Reid,” he called out, waving the doctor over.

Spencer got up and came up the stairs nervously, aware that something was going on from the look on Morgan’s face.

“What?” he asked anxiously.

“I need you to be completely honest with me,” Morgan said, putting his hands on Spencer’s shoulders and making him look directly at him.

“Okay,” Spencer said unsurely.

“Did Hotch threaten you in any way to get you in the relationship?” he asked.

Spencer immediately pulled away, “no! Of course not!”

“Is he hurting you?”

“No! Why are you asking me this?” Spencer scowled.

“I’ve seen bruises on your wrists multiple times,” Morgan said.

“I appreciate the concern,” Spencer said, “but Hotch is not abusive.”   


Morgan looked at him like he didn’t fully believe Spencer and the younger sighed, “you’ve already made up your mind about it. I get it that you don’t approve of it, but don’t for a minute think Hotch would ever hurt me. If you don’t trust him, at least trust me.”

Morgan shook his head, “I’m worried about you.”

“You don’t have to be,” Spencer said, “I’m happy and safe with him. I trust him completely. He’s never made me do something that I didn’t want. He hasn’t manipulated me in any way, and I need you to believe me.”

“Okay,” Morgan said, “okay. You’re right, I don’t approve. I don’t like it... but I’ll accept it.”

“Thank you,” Spencer said.

Morgan turned to look at Aaron, raising a finger at him, “if you  _ do  _ ever hurt him, I’m coming after you.”

“I’d expect nothing less,” Aaron said.

Morgan sucked his teeth unhappily but nodded to Spencer before leaving the office. Spencer took a shaky breath, looking at Aaron nervously.

“The others are gonna find out,” Spencer said.

“I want your permission to address it in the briefing room,” Aaron said.

Spencer blinked at him, “you want… you want to just tell them all yourself?”

“Yes,” Aaron nodded, “I don’t want to deal with another situation like this.”

“I… okay,” Spencer said, “yes.”

“Thank you,” Aaron smiled, “I know you like to keep things personal.”

“Do you think they’ll be mad at me?” Spencer asked.

“Why would they be?”

“Because I didn’t tell them,” Spencer lowered his head.

“Spencer, it was no one else’s business,” Aaron said, “you don’t owe it to anyone to share your personal business. If anyone gives you trouble about it, say I was the one who requested you not say anything.”

“No, I’m not going to blame you,” Spencer shook his head, “you did nothing wrong.”

“Neither did you,” Aaron said, “I don’t want you to feel bad about it.”

“Coffee,” Spencer suddenly blurted.

“What?”

“I need… I just need coffee,” Spencer said to himself quietly, leaving the office.

Aaron sighed, knowing that Spencer was getting too stressed to deal with what was happening. In situations like this, Aaron knew Spencer was likely to get drug cravings, and he most often substituted caffeine for Dilaudid.

Aaron kept an eye on the doctor from his office, watching as he refilled his coffee three times. When he went to get up for a fourth one, he texted the younger agent that he had had enough. Spencer looked up at him pleadingly, but Aaron just shook his head.

Spencer sat back down in his seat with a huff, drawing the attention of Prentiss next to him. Aaron could see her mouth the words, “are you okay?” and Spencer nodded, nervously bouncing his leg.

Aaron could practically see the dread on Spencer’s face when JJ walked in holding a file and announced they were ready to debrief after she’d spent about 3 hours on the phone getting details from local PD.

They got into the room and Aaron heard Prentiss once again ask Spencer if he was okay. Aaron put his hand on Spencer’s shoulder and the doctor immediately relaxed. He could see Morgan clenching his jaw out of the corner of his eye.

“Before we start, there’s something that needs to be addressed,” Aaron said, walking to the front of the table, “some of you already know, but Reid and I have been in a relationship for the past couple months.”

“Woah, wait, what?” Prentiss asked confusedly.

“Are you serious? You and Reid are a thing?” JJ questioned.

“Yes,” Aaron said.

“Damn, Spence, you got with the big boss?” Prentiss chuckled.

Spencer blushed and bit his lip.

“Penelope?” Morgan scowled, “did you know?”

“Wh- what? What do you mean? I didn’t even say anything,” she stuttered.

“You didn’t react,” Morgan said, “ _ at all. _ You knew!”   


“Yes! Okay, I’m sorry! I realized it earlier today, but it wasn’t any of my business to tell!” she said.

Morgan sighed and shook his head in disbelief.

“Listen, it really is no one else’s business besides Reid and I. I want everyone to be on the same page. Do not let this get in the way of our duties,” Aaron said.

“You think you can both stay professional if one of you is in trouble?” JJ asked.

“Yes,” Aaron and Spencer said simultaneously.

“Does Strauss know?” Prentiss questioned.

“No,” Aaron shook his head.

“What are you gonna do when she finds out?”

“We’ll deal with that when it happens, for now, let’s focus on the case,” Aaron said, sitting down and indicating for JJ to start debriefing.

Things were tense between Morgan and Aaron during the case and it obviously upset Spencer. He also had to endure the berating questions from Prentiss and JJ whenever they were alone together.

“So how did you two become a thing?” Prentiss asked.

“It’s a long story,” Spencer said.

“But you’re safe? You haven’t gotten hurt at all?” she questioned.

“Why does everyone keep asking me that?” Spencer scowled.

“Well, we saw bruises on you… and sometimes you walked a little weird like you were in pain,” JJ said.

Spencer flushed bright red, covering his face, “Oh, my God.”

“Y’all into some kinky shit, huh?” Prentiss teased him, poking his side.

Spencer said nothing, turning around and walking away as the two women giggled to each other.

The UnSub had been stalking victims who attended drug rehabilitation services from different locations, and the police brought in an addict who they believed may have seen something. The man refused to speak, ignoring the sneering tone the officers were using with him.

Spencer entered the room before Aaron or Morgan could stop him and sat across from the guy.

“Ryan, I need to know what happened that day,” Spencer said, “Clary was a friend of yours, and I’m willing to bet Marissa is too. Can you tell me what you saw?”

“Why should I tell you?” Ryan asked.

“Because the sooner you tell me, the sooner you can get back to the drug den,” Spencer said, “you have approximately an hour left before you start crashing, you’ve been on a bender for days since Clary went missing. It’s gonna hit hard if you don’t get another fix.”

“Don’t act like you understand it,” Ryan snapped.

“Trust me, I do,” Spencer said seriously.

Ryan raised his brows at him, “nah, you’re a cop. You don’t use.”

“I used to,” Spencer said, “I  _ do _ know what it’s like.”

“Do you remember it?” Ryan asked.

“Remember what?”

“The burn and then the chill,” Ryan said, “what it feels like the first time.”

Spencer twitched just slightly and Aaron could see he was struggling to keep his composure.

“Ryan, have you ever gone to rehab?”

“Twice,” Ryan said.

“You remember how bad the withdrawal was?”

“Of course.”

“Marissa was using again before she was kidnapped. Right now, she is going through withdrawal without anyone’s help. Completely alone and scared. You know how painful it is, can you imagine doing it without anything to help you get through it?” Spencer asked and Ryan shook his head. “I need you to tell me everything so I can find her.”

Ryan took a breath and nodded before telling Spencer everything he remembered about the days Marissa and Clary went missing.

“Did Reid go to rehab, or did he detox on his own?” Morgan asked Aaron.

“I helped him detox at my apartment,” Aaron said, “the week he took sick leave.”

“You still came into work, you left him alone while he went through withdrawal?” Morgan asked angrily.

“I was in constant contact with him,” Aaron said, “I had it under control.”

Morgan’s nostrils flared and his lips disappeared as he silently raged, moving away from Aaron in an attempt to calm himself.

Spencer could see the tension between them when he returned to the room, looking at both of them questioningly. Morgan left without a word, leaving the doctor confused and a little hurt, thinking it was about the way he talked to Ryan.

“It’s not something you did,” Aaron assured him, “he’s angry at me.”

“I don’t like him being mad at you,” Spencer said.

“Let me worry about it,” Aaron said, “I just want you to focus.”

Unfortunately, the case ended badly with the UnSub committing suicide with a gun in front of Spencer and Prentiss, splattering them in blood. They were too late to save Marissa, and it was disheartening for all of them as forensics picked off pieces of brain matter from their clothes.

Spencer and Prentiss were able to take showers when they got back to the hotel as everyone packed their bags and headed to the jet. No one said a word, understandably upset about how everything had turned out.

Aaron sat next to Spencer and put a hand on his thigh to try and comfort him, but Spencer moved away, shuffling into the corner of his seat. Aaron let him have his space, assuming Spencer would speak to him when he was ready. 

The next several days were hard on everyone as they had to fill out mountains of paperwork on the case, reporting no survivors. Spencer tried to act like he was okay, but Aaron could tell he was shaken.

They were at his apartment, and Aaron had Spencer pressed into the couch, kissing along his neck and sliding a hand under his shirt. He wanted to distract the younger from his racing thoughts and stripped him, kissing every inch of his body. 

With the help of a packet of lube, Aaron worked two fingers into him, drawing moans from the doctor. He added a third and pumped them in and out, stroking the bundle of nerves that had Spencer shivering. 

Aaron pulled his fingers out and slicked himself up, pushing in slowly. Spencer spread his legs more for Aaron to fit between and keened as the older man began to thrust.

Aaron was about to speed up when he noticed Spencer’s breathing becoming erratic, eyes squeezed shut.

“Spencer?” Aaron stopped moving.

“Ei-Einstein,” Spencer gasped.

Aaron immediately pulled out and Spencer momentarily lost track of time until Aaron was sitting him up slowly and urging him to drink some water.

He stroked Spencer’s hair soothingly, speaking to him calmly to help him relax his breathing. “Inhale… and exhale,” he instructed him, getting him to breathe in time with him.

“Mm sorry,” Spencer mumbled.

“It’s okay,” Aaron said, rubbing circles into Spencer’s thigh.

Spencer made a gesture Aaron could only describe as ‘grabby hands’, holding his arms open. Aaron embraced him, knowing the doctor was nonverbally asking for a hug. He pulled him down into a lying position, letting the younger rest on his chest as he stroked up and down his back lightly with his fingertips.

“How are you feeling?” Aaron asked, “any pain?”

“No, I just… I don’t know what happened,” Spencer said, “you didn’t hurt me, I just got overwhelmed, I think? It just felt like everything was closing in. I’m sorry I made you stop.”

“Spencer, I would have been upset if you hadn’t said anything and let me keep going when you were in distress. I’m proud of you for using your safeword. Don’t ever feel bad about using it,” Aaron said, “I will always stop, no matter what.”

“We can keep going now,” Spencer said.

“No, I think we should stop for tonight,” Aaron shook his head, “we need to talk about this more to avoid it happening again. I’m worried about you. Have you ever felt something like that before?”

“I started getting panic attacks after Georgia,” Spencer said, “it kinda felt like that, but not quite the same.”

“I didn’t know you were having panic attacks,” Aaron frowned.

“It stopped mostly after you got me clean,” Spencer said, “I still sometimes get them after nightmares though.”

“Do you think the case is affecting you emotionally?” Aaron asked.

“Yes,” Spencer said, “I know that’s definitely part of it. I’ve been having non stop cravings since talking to Ryan and just… the whole case really messed me up.”

Aaron kissed the top of his head, “I know it’s difficult, but you’re gonna be okay. I’m here for you. Talk to me when you’re feeling like this instead of bottling it up.”

“You do the same thing,” Spencer sat up onto his elbows, “will you talk to me too?”

“Is that something you want?” Aaron asked.

“My mom and I used to do this thing that we called Coffee Therapy,” Spencer said, “we’d go to the same coffee shop, order the same drinks every time, and just talk.”

“That sounds nice,” Aaron said, “I’d enjoy that.”

Spencer smiled and leaned up to kiss him before lying back down, enjoying the feeling of being close to the older man who had given him so much.


	6. Chapter 6

Aaron was a bit apprehensive of “Coffee Therapy” when they first started doing it. He wasn’t used to sharing his feelings, he had always been the one people came to about  _ their _ problems.

True to his roots, Spencer always got the same drink and they went to the same coffee shop every time. Aaron found himself enjoying it after he got over his initial discomfort. If Spencer, the most private person he knew, actually trusted him enough to share his personal business, Aaron was damn well going to reciprocate.

One of Aaron’s favourite things to see was how well Spencer got along with Jack. The doctor had said before that most children and babies made him uncomfortable, but the two were like peas in a pod.

Every time Aaron spoke to Jack, his son always asked about Spencer. He found it adorable when Jack would shoot rapid fire questions about science and Spencer answered them all, amazing the little boy.

Spencer always helped out Jack with his homework too. He struggled a bit with math and Spencer took it upon himself to act as a tutor, teaching Jack in a way he could fully understand. 

Aaron was surprised when Haley asked about Spencer too on their occasional phone calls or when one of them was dropping Jack off at the other’s place. She seemed suspicious about why Aaron was spending so much time with Spencer and why their son was always talking about the doctor and all the scientific facts he learned from him.

“Are you together?” she eventually asked as Jack climbed into the car on his own. 

“Yes,” Aaron said honestly.

Haley took a deep breath and nodded, obviously not pleased.

“Jack likes him,” she said.

“They get along really well,” Aaron nodded, “I’m not going to make Spencer stay away every time Jack is over if that’s what you’re going to ask me to do.”

“No,” Haley shook her head, “I’m not gonna to ask you to separate them. Jack adores him far too much, it would be cruel to do that to him.”

“Why do you seem upset?” Aaron asked. 

“Jack seems to like him more than he likes  _ me _ ,” Haley said.

“Haley, you know that’s not true. You’re his mother and he loves you,” Aaron frowned.

“I’m his mother and he loves me but he doesn’t  _ like  _ me the way he likes Spencer,” Haley said, “I want to see what they’re like together, so I can understand more the connection they have.”

“What’s your boyfriend’s name?” Aaron asked.

“Jeffrey,” Haley said.

“Why don’t you, Jeffrey, and Jack join Spencer and I for dinner sometime?”

“You don’t think that’s gonna be a bit awkward?”

“Maybe, but I think it would be good to see each other’s partners just to know who Jack is spending his time with,” Aaron said, “I don’t know if you’ve ever actually met Spencer before.”

“I’ve seen him a couple times, but I haven’t talked to him,” Haley said.

“I think you’ll like him,” Aaron smiled, “he’ll probably be a nervous wreck though.”

“Aw, I don’t want to make him nervous,” Haley laughed, “I should get going. Let me know when you plan on having this little double date.”

“Okay,” Aaron said, and Haley gave him a hug, kissing his cheek.

In retrospect, Aaron probably should have discussed it with Spencer before saying anything because “nervous wreck” didn’t even  _ begin  _ to describe the doctor’s state when Aaron brought it up.

“I can’t!” Spencer exclaimed, “what if I do something and then she doesn’t like me and then she won’t let me see Jack anymore?!”

“Spencer, relax,” Aaron said calmly.

“I can’t relax! She was your wife for so long, how am I supposed to live up to her?” Spencer asked.

“‘Live up to her’?” Aaron frowned, “Spencer, I don’t want you to replace her, I just want  _ you _ . And she said she would never separate you and Jack because he likes you so much.”

“You were together since high school, you loved her forever, how am I ever going to compare with her?”

“I loved her romantically for a long time, yes, but it’s only platonic love now. She’s the mother of my child and I care for her deeply, but I care about  _ you _ too,” Aaron said, “I would never compare the two of you. You’re completely different.”

“What if you get bored of me?” Spencer asked quietly, biting his lip.

Aaron stepped forward and wrapped his arms around Spencer’s waist. “How could I ever get bored of you?” Aaron said like it was the most ridiculous thing he’d ever heard. “There’s not a day that goes by that you don’t amaze me, Spencer.”

Spencer rested his head on Aaron’s shoulder, hands on the older man’s pecs.

“I like being with you, I don’t want to do anything to ruin it,” Spencer whispered.

“Spencer, I’m telling you, there’s nothing that would make me stop loving you,” Aaron said.

Spencer immediately pulled back, looking up at him with wide doe eyes. “You love me?” he asked in shock.

“I do,” Aaron said.

“I, uh, I-I love you too,” Spencer fiddled with the hem of his sweater nervously.

Aaron pulled him back closer by the belt loops of his pants. “Spencer Reid, I’m not going anywhere,” Aaron said firmly, “you’re stuck with me.”

* * *

“Spencer, what’s this?” Aaron held up a strip of slightly worn out, fluffy fabric that he pulled from Spencer’s pocket from the pants that had been folded on the chair.

“Oh, it’s uh, it’s what I use to stim with,” Spencer blushed.

“Stim?” Aaron asked, unfamiliar with the term.

“Self-stimulation,” Spencer twitched, “a lot of neurodivergent people do it. Some do repetitive movements or make sounds, others use physical stimulation like chewing on things or touching things. I like touching soft things, it just calms me down.”

Aaron thought back to all the times he’d seen Spencer’s hands in his pockets whenever he was nervous. He always thought the younger was just awkward and didn’t know what to do with his hands.

“Are there other things that you like?” Aaron asked curiously.

“I just like feeling things, I guess I’m more of a tactile person,” Spencer shrugged, “I like clay or things I can manipulate, but it’s mostly just touching soft things like fur. But not real fur, because that would make me feel bad about animal cruelty, so I just always use faux or something like fleece.”

Aaron nodded, making a mental note to look into it further and made sure to give the strip of fabric back to Spencer.

When the time for the double date came around, Aaron originally thought Spencer was going to fake being sick just to get out of going. The doctor seemed absolutely terrified of the idea, but also determined to make a good impression.

“Spencer, just be yourself,” Aaron said, “try and relax a little bit. Jack is gonna be there, you can just focus on him if you need to.”

“Okay,” Spencer took a deep breath, “okay, okay.”

The first thing they noticed is that Jeffrey looked  _ a lot  _ like Aaron. He had dark brown hair and brown eyes and was tall. He was thinner than Aaron, not as muscular, but the similarities were there. It seemed Haley had a type.

Jeffrey shook his hand and reached out to shake Spencer’s too, but the doctor uncomfortably waved instead, not wanting to be touched by a stranger. It was awkward for a moment until Jack launched into his arms, hugging him tightly.

“I missed you, Spencer!” Jack squealed.

“I missed you too, buddy,” Spencer completely lit up, all nervousness disappearing, “how’d you do on the math test?”

“I got a hundred percent!” Jack smiled his adorable gap toothed smile.

Spencer put his hands out for a double high five which Jack happily obliged. Spencer looked up to see Haley smiling and Jack grabbed his hand, pulling him into the restaurant exclaiming that they can draw on the tables covered in papers with crayons.

The table they sat at was a U shape. Aaron sat at one end with Spencer to the right of him then Jack in between Spencer and Haley with Jeffrey directly across from Aaron. Having been agents for so long, the two always wanted to be able to see the door, and they were thankful the situation let them.

Jack and Spencer were in their own little word, drawing together and giggling.

“So, you two work together?” Jeffrey asked Aaron.

“Yes,” Aaron said.

“Haley didn’t really tell me much about what you do exactly,” Jeffrey said. Haley put her tongue in her cheek like she always did when she was unhappy.

“Well, we assist local law enforcement in finding suspects by providing a profile of who they should look for,” Aaron said.

“How do you create a profile? What influences your opinion for who you should look for?” Jeffrey asked.

“It’s not exactly a child friendly discussion,” Haley said, picking up her drink and taking a sip.

The waiter came around and took all their orders, breaking Jack and Spencer from their deep focus just for a moment before they went back to it.

“What are you drawing?” Aaron asked.

“Dinosaurs!” Jack said.

“What kind of dinosaurs?” Jeffrey asked.

“An-ank, uh, how do you say it?” Jack looked up at Spencer.

“Ankylosaurus,” Spencer said, “it was an armored herbivore that had a club tail that could break the ankles of carnivores such as tyrannosaurus and other large predators.”

Both Haley’s and Jeffrey’s eyebrows raised at the explanation.

“You know a lot about dinosaurs,” Jeffrey said.

“Spencer knows a lot about everything,” Jack piped up, “he’s a doctor too!”

“What kind of medicine?” Haley asked. 

“Oh, not that kind of doctor,” Spencer chuckled.

“Then what kind of doctor are you?” Jeffrey asked skeptically. Aaron's impression of him immediately changed at the demeaning tone. He didn’t know if his face altered or something, but he could see Haley knew Aaron was not pleased.

“Spencer has PhDs in mathematics, chemistry, and engineering and several other degrees in other fields,” Aaron said, trying to keep his voice neutral.

“That’s impressive,” Haley said, attempting to break the tension that was beginning to start between Aaron and Jeffrey. “I’m glad Jack has his very own genius to teach him. His grades have improved so much recently. He can even name all the constellations when we look at the stars.”

“Spencer’s favourite constellation is Centaurus,” Jack said, “I like Auriga.”

Their food arrived soon after and the conversations lulled into a silence except for Jack blabbing about school and different facts he’d learned from Spencer, occasionally stopping to ask the agent more questions.

Spencer obviously picked up on Aaron’s unhappiness and it in turn fed his own anxiety. Aaron saw Spencer’s left hand go into his pocket, feeling the fabric to try and calm himself as they all continued to eat.

Aaron put a comforting hand on his thigh, helping him relax slightly.

“Spencer, how did you join the BAU?” Haley asked.

“I was scouted by the FBI as soon as I got into college,” Spencer said, “they stayed in contact with me until I reached the minimum age. Originally, they wanted me in tactical because of my ability to memorize maps, but the physical testing for it was too much for me and I was more interested in psychology anyways.” 

“Yeah, you don’t really strike me as the sporty type,” Jeffrey laughed.

Haley sighed, knowing there was no way Aaron was ever going to accept Jeffrey now that he’d insulted Spencer twice.

“Yeah, not the sporty type,” Spencer said, “Aaron’s the one who actually takes down the UnSubs.”

“UnSubs?” Jeffrey asked.

“The bad guys!” Jack said, “Spencer finds who they are, and Daddy catches them!”

“Spencer is better at negotiation and de-escalation when there are hostages while another agent and I usually do the chases,” Aaron said.

“Sounds like a lot of work,” Jeffrey whistled.

“It is,” Spencer and Aaron said simultaneously.

The rest of the dinner went fairly okay besides the stiffness between Aaron and Jeffrey. Spencer focused mainly on Jack, trying to ignore the tension as best he could and Haley seemed to be doing the same.

Aaron was pleased when Spencer and Haley started a little conversation of their own while he tried to make it seem like he didn’t totally dislike Jeffrey. Aaron asked questions to try and find out how Jeffrey was treating Jack, watching his body language closely for any sign the man might be a threat to his son although he knew Haley wouldn’t let someone close if she thought they might hurt Jack.

Jack suddenly squealed and wrapped his arms around one of Spencer’s, hugging it tightly.

“Daddy, did you hear? Spencer said we could go to the aquarium!” Jack said.

“I thought you didn’t like sharks,” Aaron looked at Spencer.

“I can admire them from behind plexiglass,” Spencer shrugged, “hundreds of thousands of years of evolution in different species. They’re quite interesting really, I just… don’t like all the teeth.”

“Will they have one of those big Great White sharks?” Jack asked.

“Maybe,” Spencer said, knowing damn well aquariums didn’t have Great Whites, but not wanting to ruin Jack’s mood.

It showed Aaron how in tune Spencer had become. Before, he would say things without regard for how people would react to them, being so painfully socially awkward. Now, he was more aware of himself and how he came across to others.

When they were done eating, Aaron paid for himself, Spencer, and Jack while Jeffrey paid for himself and Haley. When they exited the restaurant, Aaron bent down and gave Jack a big hug. 

“Bye, Daddy, I love you,” Jack said.

“I love you, buddy,” Aaron said.

When he pulled away, Jack hugged Spencer around the waist. “I love you too, Spencer,” he said.

Spencer looked to Aaron wide eyed, not knowing what to say. He gave Jack a squeeze back and said, “promise to be good for your mom, and I’ll show you more magic tricks, okay?”

“Okay!” Jack said, pulling back to look up at him, ”I promise!”

Haley gave both of them a hug too before holding Jack’s hand and walking with Jeffrey to their car. Spencer seemed to be frozen still for a moment until Aaron grabbed his hand and started leading him to the car they arrived in.

“Well, Jack certainly likes you,” Aaron said amusedly.

Spencer broke out into a big grin, bumping against Aaron. “I’m serious, he’s only ever said that to Haley and I. No one else. It means a lot,” Aaron said.

“Should I have said it back?” Spencer suddenly worried.

“You handled it really well,” Aaron said, “you don’t have to say it back if you don’t feel it.”

“I  _ do _ feel it though,” Spencer said, “I care about him a lot.”

Aaron felt his heart swell and he picked Spencer up by his waist, swirling him around. The younger squeaked in surprise, giggling adorable as Aaron placed him down. 

“Doctor Reid,” Aaron said, “you are absolutely perfect.”

Aaron could see Spencer blush from the streetlights illuminating the parking lot.

“You’re uh, not too bad yourself,” he said shyly.

Aaron wanted Spencer to stay the night but as soon as they arrived at his apartment they got an emergency call about a child abduction in California. Spencer thankfully had some work clothes and an extra go-bag at Aaron’s place and Aaron had the same at Spencer’s place for exactly that sort of situation.

* * *

**AN:** during the episode Amplification.

* * *

Aaron’s stomach dropped the moment he got the call that Spencer had been exposed to Anthrax. He raced to the house, questioning Morgan over and over again.

Spencer, being as stubborn as he was, searched the house until he physically couldn’t anymore. Aaron didn’t want to separate from him, but he had to find the one responsible.

Every minute meant Spencer was another minute closer to death. He got word that the doctor was coughing up blood and couldn’t even speak and it felt like Aaron’s heart was being stabbed. It took all of his willpower not to shoot Brown once he was in custody.

The cure was found in Dr. Nichols’ inhaler and Spencer was treated, but they weren’t able to see him for a few days until he improved enough.

Aaron finally was able to get to the hospital room and Spencer lit up with a bright smile the moment he saw him.

“How do you feel?” Aaron asked, walking forward to hold his hand.

“Still a little weak, but they said I should be off oxygen by tonight and I can go home tomorrow,” Spencer played with Aaron’s fingers.

“I was so worried about you,” Aaron swallowed, sitting down in the chair.

“I’m okay,” Spencer assured him, squeezing his hand.

Aaron leaned forward and kissed him on the forehead, stroking his long hair. “Jack’s been asking about you,” Aaron said, “I told him you were sick and he started making ‘get well’ cards.”

Spencer laughed but it turned into a coughing fit and he cringed, holding his chest.

“Does it hurt?” Aaron asked.

“A bit sore, but it mostly just feels like pressure,” Spencer said, “I’m cleared to go back to work at the end of the week.”

“I wish you would take a little while longer to heal up,” Aaron said.

“There’s already another case going on, I heard,” Spencer shook his head, “and you’re not there.”

“I didn’t want to leave you,” Aaron said, “I wanted to make sure you were out of the hospital and had someone to watch over you while I’m gone. Garcia is gonna come over and check on you until you’re good.”

Spencer knew it would be of no use to argue with him, so he just laid back and accepted his fate that he would have Garcia fretting over him for the next few days.

“She’ll take care of me, don’t worry,” Spencer said.

“I know,” Aaron smiled.

Aaron stayed for the rest of visiting hours, and drove Spencer home the next day when he was released from the hospital. He gave Garcia the list of things to look out for in case Spencer suddenly declined and kissed the doctor goodbye before he left to join the rest of the team in Indiana.

Spencer endured four days of Garcia berating him with questions about their relationship. He eventually gave in and told her a few details, but refused to go in depth.

“So who started it?” she asked.

“I said something about feeling out of control and that I just wished someone could take over for me and he offered,” Spencer said.

“Oh, so it’s like a… D/s kinda thing?” she leaned in intently.

Spencer blushed, “yeah.”

“Huh!” she said, “I mean, I always knew you were the submissive type, and Hotch is all dark and dominant, but I never imagined you two  _ together!  _ You’re a pretty hot couple.”

“Um, thank you?” Spencer said unsurely.

“Does Hotch’s ex know?” Garcia asked.

“Yeah, we had dinner altogether,” Spencer said.

“You and Hotch had dinner with Haley?” she asked, completely shocked.

“And her boyfriend and Jack.”

“What kind of twisted double date is that?” she laughed.

“It went okay, but Hotch doesn’t like the new boyfriend,” Spencer shrugged.

“He’s not jealous, is he?” she questioned.

“No, it’s just Jeffrey made some comments to me that Aaron didn’t like,” Spencer said.

“You just called him Aaron, that’s adorable,” she squealed, “but what did he say?”

“I mean, it didn’t really bother me, but Hotch thought he was being condescending,” Spencer said.

“Ooo, what a bitch. I’m on Hotch’s side,” she said, “he must defend your honour!”

Spencer snorted, jokingly shoving her.

“Do you get along with Haley and Jack though?” she asked.

“I absolutely adore Jack,” Spencer smiled, “I’d adopt him if I could. Haley seems nice. I’ve only talked to her a couple times. I was scared that if she didn’t like me, she wouldn’t let me see Jack, but she said even if she  _ didn’t _ like me she wouldn’t do that.”

“Good, good,” Garcia smiled. She looked at her phone when her text tone dinged. “Ah, I have to get back to the castle. I left a bunch of snacks in the kitchen and you have frozen meals in your freezer. Text me if you need anything.”

“Okay, thank you,” Spencer said, hugging her back when she gave him a squeeze.

“Also, if you ever want a secure platform to send some  _ things _ to Hotch, just ask me and I got you, boo. Bye!”

“Bye, Garcia,” Spencer facepalmed, but deep down, he thought that he  _ may  _ actually take her up on that offer.


	7. Chapter 7

When Spencer recovered enough, he joined them all in Indiana. They all kept a close eye on him, just to be cautious, but Spencer seemed to be doing okay. Aaron kept him by his side as much as possible, but Spencer assured him over and over again that he was fine.

After the case was over, Aaron was feeling desperate to spend some time with Spencer. He invited the younger over to his apartment and had him pressed against the door, kissing him roughly as soon as he was inside.

“I’m going to make you feel so good,” he said, nipping his pale throat.

He stripped Spencer and brought him into the bedroom, sitting him down on the mattress.

“Spencer,” he said, “it’s really important that you remember you can use your safeword at any time.”

“I know,” Spencer said, unsure of what was about to happen.

“I’m going to tie you up and use the vibe on you. I’m going to see how many times I can make you cum and then I’m going to fuck you,” Aaron said.

Spencer shivered with excitement, biting his lip and nodding.

“Safeword?”

“Einstein.”

Aaron put Spencer on his hands and knees before pressing him down between his shoulder blades so his upper body was against the mattress but his ass was in the air. He moved Spencer’s arms upward and attached them to the headboard using handcuffs. He spaced Spencer’s legs out a little bit, hands ghosting over smooth skin.

Spencer heard the cap on the bottle of lube before slick fingers began opening him up. Aaron scissored two in and out of him, drawing moans from him when he targeted Spencer’s prostate.

He added a bit more pressure to it, rubbing circles into the bundle of nerves until Spencer came, cum dripping down underneath him.

Aaron withdrew his fingers and grabbed the vibrator, pouring lube on it. He teased Spencer’s hole for a few seconds before slowly pushing it in. Using the remote control in his hand, he turned it on the lowest setting when it settled into him fully.

“Uhn!” Spencer moaned as it turned up. He could hear Aaron walking around him, watching him as he pulled against the cuffs and tried to muffle his sounds in the pillow.

Aaron yanked on his hair harshly, “let me hear you.”

The vibrations suddenly increased and Spencer cried out loudly, jerking violently. Aaron played with the settings, bringing Spencer over the edge again and again. Spencer felt the bed dip next to him and a hand slid up his inner thigh. Aaron pressed on the vibe, pulling it out and pushing it back in over and over, angling it to press against his prostate.

Spencer lost count of how many times he came as another hand wrapped around his cock, pumping him in time with the thrusts of the vibrator. “AH! A-Aaron,” Spencer gasped, shuddering through another orgasm. “I ca-ah! I c-uhn! Can’t!” he shouted, barely able to form words.

Aaron removed the vibe, stroking Spencer’s back. Spencer's head was so clouded, he didn’t even feel Aaron getting behind him until a hard cock was pressing into him.

He whined as he was stretched wider than the toy and Aaron began a harsh pace. The older man used his weight to push Spencer down flat, sitting on the backs of his thighs as he pounded him into the mattress.

Spencer was helpless under him, unable to do anything other than sob at the overstimulation that sent lightning bolts through his body. Every thrust caused his dick to rub against the bed under him, slick from where he had cum before.

Aaron hammered into him, holding him down with a bruising grip as his pace began to falter. Spencer wailed as Aaron leaned forward and bit down on his shoulder hard, his vision blacking out as his body spasmed through another orgasm, cumming dry.

“Spencer,” he heard his voice being called from far away. “Spencer,” it sounded closer and there was a hand shaking him. “Spencer,” Aaron’s voice said right next to him.

He opened his eyes to find himself facing up, his wrists uncuffed and Aaron’s face looking down at him concernedly.

“You passed out,” Aaron said.

Spencer opened his mouth to speak but realized he couldn’t even form words, so he simply tipped his face into Aaron’s hand that was stroking his cheek.

“Do you want to take a bath?” Aaron asked.

Spencer nodded slowly, but found himself whining petulantly when Aaron pulled away.

“I’ll be right back, I’m just going to fill the tub,” Aaron assured him, kissing his forehead.

It was only a couple minutes, but it felt like an eternity before Aaron returned and scooped him up like he weighed nothing. He carried Spencer to the bathroom bridal style and gently lowered him into the tub before getting in behind him.

Spencer’s back was pressed against Aaron’s chest and he tilted his head back to rest on the man’s shoulder.

Aaron was extremely gentle with him, washing him carefully and showering him with affection. He kissed Spencer’s shoulder where the bite mark was beginning to bruise brightly. He cupped a hand over Spencer’s eyes as he poured water on him to wash the shampoo out of his hair, preventing any soap from getting in them. 

Spencer felt like he was floating. Everything was calm and peaceful and Spencer was feeling amazing.

Aaron had seen people in subspace before. He had dabbled in BDSM with other people, with Haley’s permission of course. He had never seen someone  _ so  _ far in subspace, they were completely oblivious to everything around them like Spencer was.

Spencer was limp against him, letting Aaron move him any way he wanted. He had his eyes closed, but Aaron could tell he wasn’t quite asleep.

“You were so good for me,” Aaron said quietly, tracing Spencer’s collarbone. “You’re my beautiful boy, you know that?”

Spencer slowly shifted around until he was straddling Aaron, resting his head on his chest so he could hear his heartbeat. Aaron wrapped his arms around the younger, stroking along his spine.

They stayed in the tub until Spencer began to shiver, the adrenaline wearing off and the water starting to cool. Aaron lifted him out and sat him down on the edge before drying both of them off. He held a cup for Spencer to drink water from, wanting to rehydrate him and then helping him brush his teeth.

He carried Spencer to the chair and set him down, covering him with a fluffy blanket while he quickly stripped the bed and changed the ruined sheets. He wanted to feel Spencer’s skin against his own more, so he didn’t dress either of them.

Aaron brought Spencer to the bed and put more blankets on top of him before getting in on the other side. He pulled Spencer close and the younger agent was asleep within a matter of seconds as soon as his head was on Aaron’s chest, completely exhausted.

Aaron stayed up a little while longer, just stroking Spencer’s wet hair and enjoying the warmth radiating from the doctor and thinking about how lucky he was to have Spencer all to himself.

* * *

The next day was Saturday and Aaron let Spencer sleep in late. He slowly untangled himself from Spencer’s lanky limbs and decided to make breakfast for the two of them. He went to the kitchen and grabbed a pan and ingredients before starting to make french toast. 

When it was done, Aaron poured some coffee and put the plates on a tray, carrying them back to the bedroom. He placed it on the bedside table and gently shook the younger man.

“Spencer, time to wake up,” he said softly. The doctor groaned and pulled the covers over his head. “Spencer, I have coffee for you.”

The younger agent peeked up at him from under the blanket, “coffee?”

“Yes, coffee,” Aaron chuckled and held out the mug for him to take.

Spencer sat up slowly, wincing slightly.

“Are you in pain?” Aaron asked.

“Everything is sore,” Spencer stretched his neck as he took the cup and sipped from it.

“Well, you did cum thirteen times,” Aaron said.

_ “Thirteen?”  _ Spencer gawked, “that’s not possible!”

“Apparently, it is,” Aaron laughed, “I was amazed.”

Aaron got on the bed and put the tray down in front of them. Spencer shuffled a little closer to him and thanked him for making breakfast. “It’s really good,” he said after taking a bite.

“Glad you like it,” Aaron smiled, watching Spencer devour the plate, without a doubt starving from the exertion of the night before.

“Jack is coming over later to spend the weekend,” Aaron said, “do you think you’re up for going to the aquarium?”

“I don’t know about all that walking,” Spencer said unsurely.

“We can take it slow or we can just stay in and watch a movie tonight,” Aaron said.

“Let’s go,” Spencer eventually decided, “I want to see the different species of jellyfish they have there.”

Haley dropped Jack off later in the day and he greeted both of them with a big hug.

“You ready to see some sharks?” Aaron asked.

Jack gasped loudly, “yes! Spencer, you ready to see sharks?!”

“As ready as I’ll ever be,” Spencer smiled.

When they arrived at the aquarium, Aaron paid the entrance fee for them and they slowly made their way through the tunnels, surrounded by ocean life.

“Spencer, why are you walking weird?” Jack asked and Aaron had to choke down a grin as Spencer stammered.

“I-uh, I worked out last night,” he said, “I’m not used to exercise.”

“Oh, okay,” Jack said, toddling along without a care in the world.

“Maybe we should work out more frequently, help you build up stamina,” Aaron said quietly next to Spencer, laughing as the younger agent elbowed him lightly.

“Look, Spencer, shark!” Jack said excitedly as one swam above them. “What kind is that?”

“Ginglymostoma cirratum,” Spencer said, “also known as the nurse shark. They’re relatively friendly towards humans.”

“How big do they get?” Jack asked.

“They can grow up to 14 feet, so aquariums usually only keep juveniles,” Spencer said.

“Hey, look! A clownfish! Just like Finding Nemo!” Jack ran over to the right side, pointing to some coral.

“What’s that?” Spencer asked.

Both Jack and Aaron gaped at him like he’d just sworn.

“You don’t know what Finding Nemo is?” Jack gasped and ran his hands down his cheeks, shocked and dismayed when Spencer shook his head.

“Well, we know what we’re watching tonight,” Aaron said.

“Is it a show?” Spencer asked confusedly.

“It’s one of the greatest movies of all time!” Jack lisped, “Spencer, you have to see it!”

When they were done at the aquarium, they went to a place for dinner and ice cream before heading back to Aaron’s apartment. Aaron set up the movie and Jack sat in between them on the couch as they snacked on some popcorn.

Jack was watching intently and Aaron was amused to see that Spencer was too. The doctor had his knees pulled up to his chest just like Jack and Aaron had to stop himself from bursting out laughing when he heard Spencer whisper to Jack, “is he gonna touch the butt?”

When the movie was over, Jack began quizzing Spencer to make absolutely certain he had paid attention. The two were once again in their own world, just talking to each other. Aaron was completely at ease with letting them do their own thing while he made sure the guest bedroom was ready for Jack.

It was only when it started getting late that Aaron broke up their conversation.

“Jack, it’s time for bed,” he said.

“Daaaaaaaad, I don’t want to go to bed!” Jack whined.

“We’re having a discussion right now,” Spencer pouted.

“Discussion about what?” Aaron asked.

“About what happened after the fish from the tank got out into the sea, but they’re stuck in their plastic bags,” Spencer said.

“Well, you can continue the discussion tomorrow,” Aaron said, patting Jack’s back, “go brush your teeth.”

“Aw, okay,” Jack mumbled, getting up and walking to the bathroom with his head down.

“Did you like the movie?” Aaron asked.

“The depiction of short-term memory loss was a little inaccurate, but it was good,” Spencer said, “I enjoyed it.”

“I’m glad,” Aaron kissed his cheek, “I gotta go tuck Jack in.”

“I’m gonna read for a little while,” Spencer nodded.

“Nothing too heavy,” Aaron raised a brow.

“Just a bit of Russian,” Spencer shrugged.

“Come to bed whenever you’re ready,” Aaron kissed him and went to the guest bedroom.

“Did you brush your teeth?” he asked Jack.

“Yeah,” Jack nodded.

“Did you really?” Aaron looked at him closely.

“...No,” Jack said.

“Come on, go brush ‘em.”

“Ugh, okaaaaaaay.”

When Jack was done and he came back, Aaron helped him into the bed and under the covers. He tucked him in and patted him.

“Hey, Dad?”

“Yeah?”

“Are you gonna marry Spencer?” Jack asked.

“Why do you ask?”

“Because you love him and I love him too,” Jack said, “I want him to be part of the family. Are you gonna marry him?”

“I would if I could, buddy,” Aaron said, surprising himself when he realized it was the truth.

“Why can’t you?” Jack asked.

“It’s difficult to explain,” Aaron sighed, sitting down on the bed, “there are some people who are against couples like Spencer and I being together. If Spencer and I got married now, it wouldn’t be legal. I hope, in the future, that changes.”

“Me too.”


	8. Chapter 8

**AN:** TW: talk of HIV and autism stimming

* * *

Between the attack on Aaron by the Reaper and Spencer being shot in the leg, the two barely got to see each other. They remained in constant contact, texting and calling all the time until they were recovered enough to return to work about two weeks after. Spencer struggled on his crutches to get up to Aaron’s office, but he desperately wanted to be close to the older man.

It seemed like he wasn’t the only one who wanted to be close as Aaron stayed with him as often as possible.

As the days passed, Spencer and the others noticed Aaron’s paranoia and eventually Jack and Haley had to go into protective custody. It hurt both Aaron and Spencer to be apart from Jack, but it was for his own safety. 

Aaron came to Spencer’s apartment to watch a movie together and went to pull out two wine glasses when he saw a prescription bottle in the cabinet. His heart sunk thinking it was painkillers and that Spencer had lied to him when he said he wasn’t taking any.

He picked up the bottle and looked at the name of the drug and immediately recognized it as post exposure prophylaxis.

“Spencer?” he called out, breaking the younger man from his gaze at the television where he was trying to get the movie to start.

“Hmm?” Spencer looked at him, paling slightly when he saw the bottle.

“When were you exposed to HIV?” Aaron bit his inner cheek.

“Um,” Spencer shifted uncomfortably, “when I got shot, the doctor wasn’t wearing gloves and he switched from the UnSub’s wound to mine.”

“When were you gonna tell me?” Aaron tried to keep his voice level.

“I didn’t want to stress you out anymore,” Spencer looked away guiltily, “I only have a couple days of medication left and then I’m getting tested next week.”

“So you weren’t going to tell me at all?”

“If I tested positive, of course I would, but what’s the point of worrying you when the possibility of contracting it is so low?” Spencer said.

“Spencer, this is something that I needed to know,” Aaron came closer, “I don’t like that you hid something so important and that you must be suffering so much anxiety all on your own."

“You have enough to deal with right now,” Spencer said, “how could I do that to you? How do you expect me to add more stress than you already had when _you_ are the one suffering?”

“Your safety is my priority,” Aaron said.

“It should be your own safety that’s a priority,” Spencer mumbled.

Aaron sat down next to him with a scowl. “I _need_ to know things like this, Spencer,” he said, putting a hand on the younger’s thigh. “Don’t keep stuff like this from me, please.”

Spencer nodded and Aaron could see the guilt he was feeling from his body language. He stroked the doctor’s hair, tucking it behind his ear.

“I think I’m gonna cut my hair soon,” Spencer said, “it’s gotten pretty long.”

“You’d look good with any hairstyle,” Aaron said. 

“Thanks,” Spencer blushed, scooting a little closer so he could lean against him. “How are Jack and Haley?”

“I got to talk to them for a little while yesterday. They seem to be doing okay although Jack is missing you a lot,” Aaron chuckled fondly.

“I miss him too,” Spencer said quietly, “he’s the best kid ever. You raised him well.”

Spencer wasn’t looking in his direction, so he didn’t see the smile on Aaron’s face until a big kiss was being planted on his cheek.

“I’m so glad the two of you get along,” Aaron said.

“Yeah, kids don’t usually like me,” Spencer laughed, “Emily’s cat is the only animal that’s ever liked me.”

“Do you like animals?” Aaron asked.

“Absolutely! I think animals are amazing and a lot better than people. I wish they liked me more because I’d love to have one but at the same time I’m almost never home and I wouldn’t want them to feel neglected,” Spencer said.

“Jack’s been saying he wants to get a dog,” Aaron said, “Haley is on board with it but only after we catch the Reaper. Maybe you could help Jack pick the best breed for him.”

“Well, German Shepards are his favourite breed of dog, but they’re very prone to hip dysplasia and other health issues. Big dogs especially like Great Danes have a ton of medical problems. He likes Dalmations but they can easily become neurotic,” Spencer said.

“So maybe a small dog,” Aaron nodded.

“Anything but a chihuahua,” Spencer said, “the smaller the dog, the bigger the attitude. They can be super aggressive and are not really good for children.”

“Spencer, is there a topic that you don’t like learning about?” Aaron questioned, “you know statistics and data about pretty much everything. Is there something you’re uninterested in?”

“Um… sports maybe?” Spencer said almost like a question, “I like learning about the different moves and technical aspects, I just don’t get as excited about it as Morgan does. I feel like you can never learn too much.”

“With an eidetic memory, doesn’t it get a little cramped up here?” Aaron tapped Spencer’s temple.

“You know Sherlock Holmes, right?”

“Yes.”

“Sherlock uses this technique called the method of loci where he compartmentalizes his memories or facts he knows. Essentially, you create a place in your head, it’s usually a house, but in his case it’s a palace,” Spencer said, “I do the same thing, just fold all the files away and make more rooms for more and then I can find everything I need by walking through it.”

“Anyone can use this technique?” Aaron asked.

“Yes, but it typically works better with people who are very organized or neurodivergent,” Spencer nodded.

“Speaking of neurodivergence,” Aaron said, “did you get any packages in the mail yet?”

“Yeah, I got three earlier today,” Spencer said, “I haven’t opened them since I know _I_ didn’t order them.”

“You should open them now. Where are they?” Aaron questioned.

Spencer pointed over to several packages on the floor next to a neat pile of books. Aaron got up and grabbed them, bringing them back to the couch and handing them to Spencer.

The younger man opened them carefully, not wanting to tear the packaging. It was a habit he had gotten from his mother and Aaron found it so endearing whenever he tried to preserve gift wrap.

Spencer pulled the box out of the package, his eyes lighting up when he saw the brand name on it, confirming Aaron’s suspicions that Spencer had bought from them before. The doctor opened the box and grinned at the selection of stim toys Aaron had bought for him.

Spencer let out something close to a squeal that Aaron had never heard before and latched onto the older agent’s arm, hugging it tightly.

“You like them?” Aaron asked amusedly.

“Yes! You picked my favourite kinds!” Spencer said, shaking his fists by his chest like he did sometimes when he was happy. Aaron knew it was an action some people on the autism spectrum did and Spencer usually tried to mask around others, suppressing it as best he could but was comfortable enough to do it around Aaron and occasionally some of the team.

“Open the others,” Aaron put another package in his lap.

Spencer gently placed the first box down onto the table and began opening the second. It was significantly heavier than the first and Spencer was confused when he opened it and saw a stuffed animal frog inside.

He pulled it out slowly and realized that it was a weighted toy, the smell of lavender wafting off of it.

“You can heat it up and it acts as a heating pad,” Aaron said, “it’s supposed to help calm you when you’re anxious and I know you love frogs.”

Spencer hugged it close to his chest. “I’ve never had a stuffed animal,” he said.

“Never?” Aaron frowned.

“William thought it was too ‘girly’ and Mom thought it was too childish for me,” Spencer shrugged.

“You gave the stuffed wolf you won at the fair to Jack,” Aaron said.

“Jack likes wolves,” Spencer said, “I just want him to be happy.”

“But you should be happy too,” Aaron looked at him closely.

“I _am_ happy,” Spencer said quickly, “I’m the happiest I’ve ever been when I’m with you and Jack. I don’t need objects or material things, I just want you two and the team.”

“Spencer, you are a very difficult person to want to spoil,” Aaron said.

“I’m spoiled with _this,”_ Spencer indicated to the frog.

“Well, you still have one more package,” Aaron pointed out.

Spencer placed down the frog toy on the table and opened the next package, confused at what he was looking at.

“I noticed that you like to put things in your mouth a lot, but you also get freaked out about germs. These are stim toys that you can chew on that are antibacterial and also come with a cleaner if you want to make extra sure it’s clean,” Aaron said.

Spencer blushed brightly, unaware that his oral fixation had been so obvious to the older man. “I mean, there’s other things I’d like to do with my mouth,” Spencer said and this time it was Aaron’s turn to look at him wide eyed, shocked the doctor world say such a thing.

“Oh?” Aaron raised a brow, regaining his composure as he saw Spencer’s gaze flicker down to his pants.

He unzipped his fly and pulled his trousers down slightly, waiting for Spencer to make a move.

“Go ahead,” he gave him permission after realizing Spencer was waiting for a sign. The younger’s lithe hands dipped into his boxers, freeing his cock. The angle was slightly awkward as they were sitting next to each other, but Spencer shifted farther away and leaned over, taking the tip into his mouth. 

Aaron groaned as he started hardening, enjoying the soft, velvety feeling of Spencer’s mouth. He threaded his fingers through Spencer’s long hair, guiding him to take more and bob up and down slowly. He wished he could see Spencer’s pretty lips wrapped around his dick, but he could certainly feel it.

“Good boy,” Aaron said as Spencer took him fully into his throat after letting saliva drip down the shaft to wet it. Spencer moaned quietly at the praise, sending vibrations through Aaron’s cock.

When Spencer lifted up and had just the head in his mouth, Aaron felt his wicked tongue curl around him and do things that he had never felt before.

“Jesus, where did you learn that?” Aaron asked.

Spencer giggled slightly before sliding back down and swallowing around him. Aaron let the genius have full control, something that didn’t happen often as Spencer did not like to be in charge. He could tell that the younger was a little hesitant as soon as the grip in his hair softened, so he gave him some encouragement.

“Fuck, you feel so good, baby,” he said, “just like that. Perfect.”

If Spencer had a tail, it would certainly be wagging. The praise went straight to his head and made him bold, slurping lewdly and adding a hand whenever something wasn’t in his mouth.

“Fuck!” Aaron shouted in surprise when Spencer pulled up to lick at his slit, tasting the saltiness of precum. “I’m close,” Aaron warned him after a while. Despite his age and Spencer's skilled tongue, he had incredible endurance and he was sure the boy’s jaw was aching badly.

Spencer hummed as the grip in his hair tightened again and Aaron thrust into his mouth roughly before sheathing himself completely and cumming hard down his throat with a low groan.

He released his hold on the younger after a few moments and Spencer sucked the tip to make sure he got every drop of cum before sitting back up, cheeks bright red and lips swollen with his hair ruffled and a fucked out look on his face.

Aaron reached for Spencer’s belt, but the doctor gently pushed his hands away.

“I d-,” he cleared his throat, voice rough from deepthroating, “I don’t want to do anything before I get tested.”

Aaron nodded in understanding. Despite the probability of contracting HIV was so low, he didn’t want to press Spencer into doing something he wasn’t fully comfortable with.

"Where did you learn to do that?" Aaron asked again.

"Garcia sent me kink forums where people talk about sex tips," Spencer laughed, "thank _her."_

“I think it would be unprofessional if I did. I love you, Spencer,” Aaron cupped his cheek and kissed him, “no matter what happens, I will always love you.”

“I love you too, no matter what.”


	9. Chapter 9

**AN:** This chapter is pretty short and is mostly just about the HIV test, a moment of Spencer in his headspace, and some serious stuff. HIV is a topic that's very important to me, but you're totally welcome to skip this chapter if you'd rather not read it. I'll put notes at the end if you want the summary. For anyone interested in learning more about HIV, I will also be putting links to sources at the end.

* * *

Aaron drove Spencer to the clinic to get his test the following week. The younger man was clearly nervous, drawing his uninjured knee up to his chest and fidgeting with one of the toys Aaron had gotten him during the ride. 

“It’s going to be okay,” Aaron said.

“You don’t know that,” Spencer shook his head.

“You yourself said the possibility of contraction is low,” Aaron glanced over at him.

“Low doesn’t mean impossible and I’m not known for having the best luck,” Spencer closed his eyes and took a deep breath.

Aaron reached over and stroked Spencer’s hair.

“I’m with you, no matter what,” Aaron assured him.

When they arrived, Aaron helped Spencer out of the car and gave him his crutches. He kept a hand on the genius’ back as they entered the clinic and sat him down before checking him in at the front desk. He requested that they not call out his name for privacy reasons and pointed him out so the nurses knew who he was. 

Spencer was anxiously bouncing his leg when he came back and Aaron put a comforting hand on his thigh, trying to help soothe him. When one of the nurses came out, she approached and asked if he was Mr. Reid quietly. Spencer nodded and she waved him up.

Aaron helped him out of his seat and onto his crutches, following behind.

“My name is Diana. Will he be joining us today?” she asked Spencer, tipping her head towards Aaron.

“Yes,” Spencer said.

Diana led them to one of the rooms, ushering them in.

“The doctor will be in here soon,” she said, “please, take a seat.”

Spencer awkwardly got onto the medical chair while Aaron sat down on the wooden one in the corner. Aaron was watching Spencer closely, noticing his pale skin becoming even paler and got slightly concerned he was going to pass out.

A tall blonde woman walked in with a sweet smile. She introduced herself as Dr. Russett and washed up before shaking Aaron’s hand. She already knew Spencer as she was the one who had given him the PEP when he was first exposed and was apparently aware of his dislike of shaking hands.

“We’ll be taking blood for further antibody testing alongside the rapid blood test that we will be doing today,” she said.

“How accurate is the rapid test?” Aaron asked.

“The rapid blood test is about as accurate as the laboratory testing,” Russett said, “we like to have two separate tests to confirm results.”

She grabbed some things out of the cabinet and placed them in a small basket which she put on the stool next to the medical bed.

“Alright, Dr. Reid,” she said, “if you could just hold your hand out for me, please?”

Spencer did as she asked and she disinfected his index finger before pricking it and collecting a drop of blood on the collection pad of the test. She put pressure on the small wound to stop the bleeding.

She placed the test down and after the bleeding stopped, she went to clean his inner elbow to draw blood but stopped when Spencer made a little sound.

“Uh… not that side,” he said, “you won’t get anything from it.”

Aaron bit his cheek when he realized it was most likely because his veins were so destroyed by the Dilaudid that they were not usable to draw blood from.

Russett nodded and switched to his other arm, disinfecting and tying the tourniquet around his upper arm. It took her a long time to find a viable vein, palpating around for the ‘trampoline’ feeling.

“You need to drink more water, Dr. Reid,” she chuckled as she finally found one and pushed the needle in, filling the vials quickly as she took off the tourniquet.

“I drink water,” Spencer said.

“Coffee doesn’t count, even if it has water in it,” Aaron looked at him.

Spencer blushed slightly as Russett chuckled again and Aaron was glad to see at least a little bit of colour in his face. Russett removed the needle and taped a small piece of gauze on his arm.

“The test takes around 20 minutes to give a result,” she said, “I’m going to send these to the lab and I’ll be back to read the results of the rapid test.”

“How long will it take to get the lab test back?” Aaron asked as she opened the door to leave.

“A day or two at most,” she said, “usually it’s within twelve hours. We have Dr. Reid’s number on file, we’ll call as soon as we get the results, but it’s almost certain that it will mirror what we get from the rapid.”

She closed the door behind her when she left the room and Aaron could see, even from a distance, how bad Spencer’s hands were shaking.

“Spencer, take a couple deep breaths for me,” Aaron got out of his seat and stood next to the bed. He rubbed Spencer’s back as the younger man did what he was told. Spencer sighed and leaned over, resting his head on Aaron’s chest.

“What if it’s positive?” Spencer asked quietly.

“They’ll start you on antiretroviral therapy,” Aaron said, “keep your T cells safe and suppress the infection so it doesn’t progress.”

“What about you?” Spencer looked up at him with his big doe eyes, “I wouldn’t want to get you sick too.”

“Well, the medication will eventually suppress it so much, it will become undetectable which means it will be untransmittable. We’d be safe and I’d take PREP as a preventative too,” Aaron cupped his cheek. He knew Spencer was already well aware of how the ARTs worked, but he figured he just needed reassurance.

Aaron attempted to keep Spencer distracted and calm for the remaining time by asking him about the dangerous fashion trends in the Victorian era to learn obscure facts. Spencer had relaxed for a little while up until when Russett knocked on the door and entered.

“Alright, the test should be showing the results now,” she said.

She picked up the test that was on the table next to the sink and inspected it closely.

“Your test results are negative,” she said after a moment.

Aaron nodded happily and looked to Spencer, but could see the genius was still tense.

“Dr. Reid, I’m sure you already know the exact probability of getting conflicting results,” Russett smiled softly, “I feel comfortable saying it’s okay to relax now.”

“I’d still like to get the results of the other test,” Spencer said.

Russett nodded understandingly and led them back to the waiting room, bidding them farewell with the promise of a call later.

Aaron helped Spencer into the car and got in himself. He grabbed Spencer’s hand and squeezed.

“I told you it would be okay,” Aaron said.

“I just want more confirmation,” Spencer squeezed back.

Aaron brought Spencer’s hand to his lips, kissing it softly before he started the car. The older man had been staying at Spencer’s apartment occasionally since it was closer to Quantico than his was and had better takeout restaurants nearby for when they didn’t want to cook.

Aaron ordered from Spencer’s favourite one, hoping to get the younger man to eat as he regularly stopped eating whenever he was stressed. It took lots of coaxing to get him to eat even a single bite, but he was a fairly patient person in normal life and more so when it came to Spencer.

One of the things that calmed Spencer was to kneel by Aaron, but with his knee injured, he hadn’t been able to do it for a while. They were sitting on the couch and watching a movie when Spencer got up, putting his weight on his good leg.

“Do you need your crutches?” Aaron asked, assuming he was heading to the bathroom, but Spencer shook his head and shuffled slightly until he was standing in front of Aaron. The older agent was confused until Spencer slowly sat down on the floor between Aaron’s legs and rested his head against Aaron’s inner thigh by his knee.

Aaron smiled even though Spencer couldn’t see it and grabbed a pillow, dangling it in front of the doctor.

“Put this on under you, sweetheart,” Aaron said.

Spencer placed it beneath him, his bad leg out straight and the other bent under him. Aaron always found it both endearing and hilarious the strange positions Spencer liked to sit in. It wasn’t a surprise that the younger had back pain considering his horrific posture.

“Move closer to me and lean against the couch to sit up straighter,” Aaron said. Spencer tilted his head back to look at him and Aaron stroked along his thin neck. “You’re slouching, darling.”

Spencer scooted back and looked up at the tv although Aaron knew he wasn’t actually watching. He could feel him start to relax, sinking into his headspace as Aaron pet his hair soothingly. 

He was so calm that he didn’t even hear his phone ringing some time later. Aaron picked it up, hoping it was a call from the clinic.

“Hello?” he answered.

_ “Hello, is this Spencer Reid?”  _ a woman’s voice came through the bad quality as Spencer’s phone was an outdated flip phone.

“Yes, this is,” Aaron said, knowing there was no way the younger could talk.

_ “This call is from the Stafford Urgent Care Center to report the results of the STD/HIV screening for Spencer Reid. We ran the tests three times and everything came back negative.” _

“Thank you very much,” Aaron took a deep breath.

_ “Have a good night, Mr. Reid,”  _ she said before the call ended.

Aaron closed the phone and leaned down, kissing the top of Spencer’s head. After a little while longer, Aaron decided that Spencer had been in the same position for too long and his bent leg was probably totally numb.

He spoke softly, slowly bringing him out of his headspace.

“Sweetheart, it’s time to get up,” Aaron said. Spencer made a little humming sound to let him know he’d heard and Aaron bent forward to hook his arms under Spencer’s, lifting him up and pulling him sideways into his lap gently.

Spencer wrinkled his nose in discomfort, shaking his leg a little.

“I had a feeling it would be asleep,” Aaron tutted, “I’m sorry. I let you stay down there too long.”

“I really needed it,” Spencer buried his face in Aaron’s neck.

“The clinic called,” Aaron said and felt Spencer tense up immediately. “They ran the tests multiple times and everything was negative.”

Spencer was finally able to take a sigh of relief, going lax against Aaron.

“I should have listened to you,” Spencer mumbled, “when you said it was gonna be fine. Would’ve saved a lot of stress.”

“It was a bad scare, honey,” Aaron rubbed circles into Spencer’s shoulder, “your fear was justified.”

“Are you okay?” Spencer asked.

“Yeah, I’m glad you’re alright,” Aaron said.

“I mean… everything with the Reaper,” Spencer put a hand on Aaron’s where it was on his thigh.

“He’s taunting us,” Aaron shook his head, “I know Haley is getting frustrated with all of the moving around. Jack keeps asking when they can go home and see you and I.”

“I hope we find Foyet soon.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Summary: Spencer tests negative for HIV, there's a moment of subspace, and they talk about catching Foyet.
> 
> Sources for HIV information: https://www.cdc.gov/hiv/basics/whatishiv.html  
> https://www.hiv.gov/hiv-basics/overview/about-hiv-and-aids/what-are-hiv-and-aids  
> https://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/hiv-aids/diagnosis-treatment/drc-20373531


	10. Chapter 10

After Haley and The Reaper's death in Season 5 Episode 9: “100” I love some Spencer and Jack bonding moments (don't judge) also slight **TW:** for mild homophobia towards the end of the chapter.  


* * *

Spencer stood by and supported Aaron through the internal investigation launched after Foyet’s death. He wasn’t allowed in the room as they questioned the older man, so he helped Jessica take care of Jack, who didn’t fully understand the situation. Jeffrey visited only one single time and then cut off contact with them, so uninterested, Spencer felt he probably wouldn’t even attend the funeral.

The genius tried to keep Jack from asking Aaron about what happened, but he struggled to answer his questions, especially when Jess wasn’t around.

“Spencer, when is Mommy coming home?” Jack asked, tugging on his sleeve and Spencer took a deep breath. His social skills had improved slightly since being around Jack, but he’d never been good at breaking bad news and was terrified he would say something wrong and upset the little boy.

Spencer sat down on the couch to get level with Jack, moving his cane to the side.

“Jack, Mommy isn’t coming home,” Spencer said softly.

“Why not?” Jack frowned.

“You know how Daddy and I catch bad guys?” Spencer asked.

“Mhmm,” Jack nodded.

“Daddy tried to keep you and Mommy safe from a bad guy,” Spencer said, “that’s why you and her had to keep going to different places.”

“Is she still going without me?”

Spencer shook his head, “sometimes, bad guys do things before good guys can get to them.”

“A bad guy... got to Mommy?” Jack asked.

Spencer nodded and Jack walked closer to him, holding his arms out for the doctor to pick him up. Spencer lifted him onto his lap, letting the child hug him, which he would have never been comfortable with a few months prior.

“Can I ever see her again?” Jack questioned.

“In a couple days, you’re going to see her dressed up really pretty and it’ll look like she’s sleeping,” Spencer said, “but it’s a kind of sleep that… people don’t wake up from.”

“What happens after?” Jack mumbled against his shoulder.

“She’ll have a special place to stay in, just for her,” Spencer hugged him a little tighter, “we can visit that place and leave things like flowers for her.”

“But we can't see her and she can’t talk to us when we go there?”

“No, we can't actually see her and she can’t talk to us, but she can hear us and she’ll know we are there,” Spencer said.

What he was saying went against all the facts in his head, but he’d read some material written by people who believed in the afterlife after his experience in Georgia before he was revived. The image of shadowy figures in light haunted him for some time, his mind unable to rationalize it for months until he decided it was probably his brain showing what he’d been told other people saw as it slowly died.

Regardless of what he truly thought, there was no way he was going to say those things to Jack.

“Is the bad guy gonna get me?” Jack asked after a while.

“No, Daddy got him,” Spencer rubbed Jack’s back, “Daddy got the bad guy.”

“What if a bad guy gets you?” Jack sat up, looking at him with such concern it made his heart clench. “I don’t want you to go, Spencer,” Jack’s lower lip started trembling.

“I’m not going anywhere, Jack,” Spencer assured him, “I promise.”

“Pinky promise,” Jack held out his little finger. Spencer smiled and hooked it with his own.

“Pinky promise,” he said.

* * *

Aaron's investigation was cleared the day before Haley’s memorial and funeral. The whole team, Haley’s family, and Aaron’s brother along with dozens of friends attended. Jeffrey was nowhere in sight and Haley’s father, Roy, glared at Aaron the whole time.

At the wake, Jessica and Aaron read beautiful eulogies, remembering fond moments of her. Jack sat next to Spencer as his Dad spoke. He seemed to have picked up the solemn feeling in the room and stayed quiet, looking at the wooden casket holding his mother.

After the speeches, people lined up to say their final goodbyes. Aaron walked Jack up to it, picking him up so he could see.

“Good night, Mommy,” Jack waved, “I love you.”

Aaron clenched his jaw, trying to keep his tears in. He placed Jack down and told him to go to Spencer, taking a breath before he looked down at Haley for the first time, and noticed her makeup. Her mortuary makeup artist used a colour that Haley would have never worn and Aaron momentarily wanted to stop the funeral just to make them fix it when he saw that the dress was also a style she never liked.

“She looks beautiful, doesn’t she?” one of Haley’s friends, Anna, commented to someone behind him.

Aaron wasn’t comfortable saying the things he wanted to say with so many people close by listening to him. He bent down and kissed her forehead, hating the fact that she had no body temperature.

They might not have been married anymore, but Aaron still loved and cared about her and his chest ached as he looked down at her for the last time. The pallbearers closed the casket and carried it out to the hearse. Everyone followed along in their cars, silent and focused ahead.

When they arrived at the graveyard, Spencer didn’t really know where to stand, not wanting to offend Haley’s loved ones if his body language accidentally revealed their relationship, but also wanting to be close to Aaron.

Jack was next to his father, but pulled away and went to Spencer, grabbing his hand and leading him over to stand with Aaron. It brought some curious gazes from other people, confused as to why Jack seemed so close to Aaron’s subordinate.

The little boy never let go of Spencer’s hand, leaning against him as the casket was lowered into the ground.

“Is this her special place?” Jack looked up at him and Spencer nodded. “I hope she likes it,” he lisped.

“Me too, buddy,” Spencer said. Even though Spencer hadn’t known Haley very long, they had bonded over Jack and he was the one she called when she wanted to know how the team and Aaron was doing.

It saddened him greatly to know she was gone, especially when he saw the pained look on Aaron’s face. He knew it was going to take a very long time for the older agent to heal from the loss, even more so because he blamed himself for her death.

Once the funeral ended and people began dispersing, Aaron asked Dave to drive Jack and Spencer to the apartment since the doctor couldn’t do it with his injury. Dave gave him a pat on the back, squeezing his shoulder before the others on the team hugged him.

Spencer didn’t know if he should as well but Aaron pulled him into one that lasted a little longer than the others.

“I love you,” Aaron whispered quietly into his ear, “I’ll be home later.”

“I love you too,” Spencer responded, “take as long as you need.”

They pulled apart with a lingering gaze before Spencer led Jack to the car Dave was waiting in.

Only when Aaron was the last one there did he pour his feelings out, saying everything that had been building up as he sat on the ground and ruined his suit.

* * *

Dave dropped Jack and Spencer off at Aaron’s apartment, telling the doctor quietly before he got out of the car that if he was getting overwhelmed, he could call him at any time.

Spencer thanked him and ushered Jack into the complex, away from the traffic in the parking lot. As he went to unlock the door, he jumped in surprise when it suddenly opened to reveal Roy’s angry brown eyes. He looked Spencer up and down scrutinizingly before noticing Jack.

“Hello, Jackie,” he smiled, “come on in. Your Aunt Jess is here.”

Roy apparently expected Spencer to leave as he started to close the door but stopped when Jack said, “come on, Spencer” and pulled the agent by the hand again.

“Hey,” Jess greeted him to which Spencer responded with a wave.

“Who is this?” Roy asked.

“Dad, this is Doctor Spencer Reid,” Jess said.

“Doctor?” Roy raised a brow skeptically.

“Grandpa, Spencer is super super smart! He knows  _ everything _ ,” Jack smiled.

“Okay,” Roy scowled, “so why is Doctor Reid here?”

“Spencer has been helping us take care of Jack,” Jess said, trying to prevent Jack from blurting something that would expose the relationship.

“Jack’s own father can’t take care of him?” Roy tutted.

Spencer bit his tongue, forcing himself to stay quiet even though he wanted to defend Aaron. The last thing he wanted was to pit the two against each other even more than they were already.

“Where’s Aaron?” Jess asked.

“He stayed at… he stayed back… back there,” Spencer stuttered awkwardly.

“Some  _ super smart  _ doctor,” Roy scoffed and went to the couch where his tie and suit jacket were lying over the arm. “Come here, Jack,” he patted the cushion next to him, “it’s family time.”

Jack started walking over, still holding onto Spencer when Roy shook his head.

“ _ Family  _ time, Jackie,” he said.

“But… Spencer  _ is  _ family,” Jack looked confused.

Spencer stiffened up and Roy scowled even more.

“He’s been helping take care of Jack for a week and he’s already family?” he asked suspiciously.

“Spencer’s been here  _ way _ more than a week,” Jack said, “he’s friends with Mommy too.”

“She never mentioned him,” Roy sat back with crossed arms. “Doctor Reid, what is your business here?”

“Aaron asked me to stay with Jack,” Spencer said.

“You call your boss by his first name?” Roy raised a brow.

“When we aren’t at work,” Spencer shifted uncomfortably.

“I think you should leave,” Roy said, “I want to grieve my daughter with my family.”

Spencer nodded and leaned down to hug Jack, but the boy began to pout, grabbing onto the genius’ suit.

“No! I don’t want him to go, Grandpa!” Jack objected.

“Hey, Jack, it’s okay,” Spencer patted his back, “I’ll see you soon. I think it would be good if you spend some time with your Grandpa.”

“I want you to stay!” the four year old stomped his foot.

Spencer put his cane on the ground and held both his hands out for Jack to take and rubbed his thumbs soothingly along the boy’s knuckles, something Aaron did that calmed him down when he was stressed with work.

“Jack,” he said softly, “your Grandpa, Daddy, and Auntie Jess have had a really hard day. It was tough for them to leave Mommy in her special place. I’m sure it would help cheer them up if you could be here with them and give them lots of hugs. I promise, I’ll come back to see you soon and we’ll go to the planetarium together, okay?”

Jack paused, thinking about it for a moment.

“Pinky promise?” he asked, which seemed to be becoming a very special thing between the two of them.

Spencer nodded and held his finger out, “pinky promise.”

Jack gave him a tight hug around the waist and picked his cane up for him.

“Love you, Spencer,” he said.

“Love you too, buddy,” Spencer responded without thinking about the fact that Haley’s father was there.

Just as he was about to reach for the doorknob, it started opening and he took a step back to avoid getting hit. Aaron looked so relieved to see him until he noticed the figure on his couch and cleared his throat.

“Hello, Roy,” he said.

“It’s interesting how close your son and someone who works for you are,” Roy responded, “Jack calls him ‘ _ family _ ’, why is that?”

“I’d rather not get into this right now,” Aaron shook his head, aware of Spencer’s rising anxiety.

“Get into what?” Roy stood up, “what does that mean?”

“Spencer is my teacher!” Jack suddenly piped up, “he helps me with my homework and he’s teaching me about space! Right, Spencer?”

“Yeah,” Spencer said after a second of shocked silence, “we’ve been going over the Canis Major Dwarf Galaxy which is the closest galaxy to ours and it’s approximately 25,000 light years from the Sun which is equivalent to 236 quadrillion kilometers.”

“He told me how to find the Andromeda Galaxy using the constellations,” Jack swayed back and forth, “you have to find Cassiopeia first, but sometimes I can’t find it.”

Roy looked at Spencer closely up and down once again, “ _ that _ kind of ‘super smart’ doctor.”

“Can I have ice cream, Auntie Jess?” Jack looked over to her.

“I’ll check if we have any,” she smiled, thankful to have some kind of distraction from the tension in the room, “come to the kitchen with me.”

Jack gave Spencer another hug before giving his father one too and then skipping over to her.

Once he was out of the room, Roy turned his attention to Aaron.

“What is going on here?” he asked, “why is Jack hanging off some stranger’s every word?”

“He’s a stranger to you, but not to Jack,” Aaron said, taking off his jacket and ignoring some of the blades of grass on it.

“Jack is my grandson,” Roy’s mouth pinched tight, “I want to know what kind of relationship this guy has to him.”

“Spencer is here with Jack and I regularly,” Aaron said, “they’ve built a bond because they are around each other so often and Jack likes to learn from what Spencer teaches him.”

“What’s the relationship between you two then?” Roy asked, “why is your employee here all the time?”

“That is not your business,” Aaron responded.

“It most certainly is,” Roy’s nostrils flared, “it  _ is  _ my business to know what kind of influences Jack has in his life, especially now that he doesn’t have a mother, thanks to your laziness!”

“‘Laziness’?” Spencer prickled with anger, “you have no idea how much Aaron endured trying to keep them safe. You didn’t see the weeks of no sleep, staying up all hours of the night tracking him down. Did you forget that he was also attacked?”

“My daughter would still be alive if it weren’t for him!” Roy snapped.

“Jack wouldn’t be here if it weren’t for him,” Spencer quipped back.

Roy seemed to be at a loss for words for a moment before he shook his head, “you shouldn’t even be involved in this conversation.”

“Jack and I both view Spencer as family, and if you’re concerned about his presence, he has to be involved in this,” Aaron said.

“Do you think Haley would approve of… whatever ‘this’ is?” Roy gestured with his hand. “Is this some kind of weird _ affair?” _

“Haley knew and fully approved,” Aaron said. 

Roy was about to say something most likely unsavory, but Jack walked in holding a bowl with chocolate sauce on his face.

The boy immediately went to Spencer and held up a spoonful. “Do you want a bite?” he asked, “it’s my favourite kind.”

“Thank you, buddy, but maybe next time,” Spencer smiled, “why don’t you take your ice cream to your room and read some of the book about Jupiter that I left for you?”

“Can I bring food to my room, Daddy?” Jack looked up at Aaron, knowing the rule about not eating in his bed.

“As long as you don’t make a mess,” Aaron nodded.

Jack bounded away with his bowl in hand and Aaron figured he was definitely going to have to wash chocolate off the sheets later.

“This is not okay,” Roy said once Jack was out of earshot, “this is not the kind of thing a little boy should see.”

“It’s not your decision who is and is not in Jack’s life,” Aaron said.

“Apparently it’s yours considering your decisions are why he doesn’t have a Mom anymore,” Roy grit his teeth.

“I understand that you’ve experienced a loss that isn’t something you can just get over, but it’s not fair to take out your pain on the person who tried their hardest to protect her,” Spencer said.

“You  _ ‘understand’ _ ?” Roy walked to him, getting into his face, “what do you  _ ‘understand’ _ about my loss,  _ Doctor _ ?”

Aaron could see Spencer begin to panic in the way he leaned back slightly, uncomfortable with his space being intruded.

“That’s enough,” Aaron said sternly to Roy as he took Spencer by the wrist and moved him away.

“He didn’t even know Haley!” Roy raised his voice, “she’s not even been in the ground for a day and you’re already trying to replace her!”

“I know Haley wanted to paint her room a colour called MemoryBook Blue that she found in an old magazine,” Spencer said and Roy snapped his attention to him. “I know she always took her coffee with two creams and half a sugar packet but preferred tea, especially black tea and Lavender Earl Grey was her favourite. I know she always woke up early so she could see the sunrise and sat on the second step because she thought it was ‘more comfortable than the third.’ I know she wanted to go to Paris and have real eclairs for her 50th birthday. I know she wanted to learn how to make ceramics and started doing oil paintings of the park and I know she wanted Jack to always be around people who love him.”

Roy’s face softened just slightly and Spencer met him eye to eye, something that was always difficult for the genius to do.

“I could never take Haley’s place,” he said, “I am not a replacement, I’m an addition.”

Hearing things about his daughter seemed to bring up emotions and Roy cleared his throat. “We’ll talk about this more later, Aaron,” he said, grabbing his jacket from the couch, “tell Jessica I’ll call her later.”

Roy exited the apartment, the door closing slowly behind him.

Spencer took a deep breath, turning to Aaron only to see the man looking at the floor, obviously trying to suppress whatever he was feeling.

“Aaron?” Spencer asked softly, but the older agent moved away when he tried to touch him.

“I’ll call a ride for you,” he said flatly as he walked away, leaving Spencer standing alone and drowning in concern.


End file.
